Average
Have you ever noticed, that every new parent will always tell you that their child is "slightly above average for his age" in one particular skill/ability.

Now this cant be true. Unless - and I've thought about this a lot - theres one extremely thick child somewhere to balance it all out.

Of course I'm no doubt that in about 7 months going to be saying exactly the same thing. "Yes, apparently he's slightly above average when it comes to blinking for his age".
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 9:10, 10 replies)

Haha
Exactly right.
"Oh, he's very good at talking for his age"

"Er... He's seven..."

Maybe they should just set the thresholds a bit higher.

[First of many anti-children posts today]
( Cawl, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 9:21, closed)

^^
I was speaking to a friend who also knows my ex-wife, who has a child to her now-husband. She had been telling my mate how great and clever her kid was.
I don't know if he was just trying to make me feel better but he says, "Between you and me, I've seen that kid and she's barely one step up from a spastic." I had a pleasant glow about me for the rest of the day.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 9:25, closed)

^^
Nice one!
To be fair, nobody is going to admit that their child is rubbish.

"This is my son David. Ignore the dribbling, he's a total spacker, I'm afraid."

So they'll just pick up on the one thing that they aren't a total moron at doing, like "colouring in" or som such crap, and delude themselves that their child is actually good at something.
( Cawl, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 9:28, closed)

He can hold a crayon the right way round most of the time!
Clearly he's going to be the next Van Gough!
( uberdeity Wondered why Owen Lars knew of the term "hell" on, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 9:34, closed)

My Son
My son is exceptional at pooping for his age. I mean buckets and buckets of it. I think he may end up as an actor in scat or something when he grows up.

He is also exceptional at breathing, I'd say he might do it for a living
(oeb, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 9:50, closed)

Also the reverse side that they often have a syndrome
Whether it's dyslexia, adhd, ocd, odd etc rather than them just being a thick shit brought up by parents that do nothing to educate them. When asked if they've actually been diagnosed, the parents say 'no, he's just like it' cunts.
( Brandy_Bumwinkle, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 10:14, closed)

Thick Kids
Have you been in Aldi recently? there's tons of thick kids.
(TheManofScience, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 10:37, closed)

Oh you will... you will...
People tell you all sorts of shit... and you'll fall for it and feel proud for 30 seconds and then your slightly sarcastic mind will take charge again, and you'll realise EVERYONE's god damn kid is special.

I gave up listening to anything anyone says about what my son should be doing and isn't, and can do but shouldn't...

Its all a load of bum fluff.
(Kaplaaah Wasting time on the net since 1994., Fri 18 Apr 2008, 10:47, closed)

I'm crap at maths
But aren't just under half all kids above the average for their age?
(stubbledchin, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 11:32, closed)

Shouldn't it be
Just under half of them are below median?
( uberdeity Wondered why Owen Lars knew of the term "hell" on, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 11:43, closed)