My eldest son Dan is a shy lad...
...very smart and studious and might be considered by some to be "a nerd". But he's a nice boy - friendly and wouldn't hurt a fly. Being as my daughter (the youngest) is exhibiting some exceptional diva-like qualities, I feel I can be objective enough about my kids faults and Dan's main fault is that he (like many young lads) is a grubby little soap dodger! It's hereditary unfortunately, as his dad is a bit grotty sometimes as well.

He'll be 11 in the summer and I have seem to have finally impressed upon him the importance of showering everyday and keeping himself clean - if only so that he doesn't end up being labelled as "the smelly kid" when he heads off to Secondary School in September. This has meant however, that we are all constantly coughing and spluttering in a haze of lynx each morning, but it's still a lot better than the foul stench of B.O. we can come to expect as puberty rapidly descends on us.

Anyway, I digress...

A couple of years ago, Dan was having a bit of trouble with one of the lads in his class. Darryl (and yes, that is the little sod's real name), had taken to calling my son "Dirty Daniel", after picking up on my son's (admittedly disgusting) habit of chewing his fingernails/clothes/etc. He kept on at him for some time and my son - not being especially streetwise - wasn't sure how to respond. Until one day, Dan caught his tormentor "digging for treasure" inside one of his nostrils. Almost with glee, my socially awkward young man shouted out "Haha - Dirty Darryl!" at the boy, who wasn't best pleased at receiving his own medicine, as he then promptly went and told the class teacher that Daniel was hurling racist insults at him (I should probably mention here that Darryl is black) and that my son was calling his skin colour "dirty".

*Bearing in mind, these lads were 8 at the time and already one of them knows how to pull "The Race Card".

Anyway, all hell breaks loose: Daniel is hauled in front of the headteacher and I receive a stern phone-call demanding that I come to speak to them that afternoon URGENTLY. Upon arrival at the school, I walk into the headmistress's office where I also see the S.E.N co-ordinator (for anyone without sprogs, the abbreviated letters stand for "Special Educational Needs) and my tearful, bewildered looking son.

After being given a run-down of the situation, I tell the school of Daniel having told me of this young lad calling him the exact same name for several weeks/months previously and that it was almost certainly my son's way of retaliating rather than any kind of racist remark. My son is not a racist at all and in fact this incident was probably the first time he had been made aware of what racism actually is. I also told them that the other kid in question seemed to think it was fine to snape at my son, but obviously didn't like having it done back and perhaps in fact Darryl was the racist after all? The school weren't having any of it though. The S.E.N actually said to me "how can you be sure that your son isn't racist?" and "well if you think that Daniel said this innocently, then maybe you should get him tested for potential autism, as this is the kind of thing that 'THEIR SORT' come out with". I was both gob-smacked and horrified - this is a woman who has to work with 'THEIR SORT' every single day and appeared to have nothing but contempt for them! It was becoming clear who the real bigots were...

When they tried waving something in my face for me to sign and making mention that my son would forever have this incident on file, I point blank refused and told them I wanted to reschedule this meeting again for Monday morning before school (this was a Friday afternoon) to try and resolve it after letting things cool down over the weekend. They agreed and off we stormed. My poor lad was a bit shaken up (he's rarely in trouble) and it was clear to see from a thousand paces that he didn't have a clue what was going on.

Monday morning came around and we trundled off up the school, nervous, but with an extra person in tow - my husband Chris, who had taken the morning off work to give us some moral support. See, what I have failed to mention until now, is that Chris is a big, 6ft1" black man with a pretty hard stare. He's as soft as shit really, but could easily moonlight as a bouncer. He also happens to have been my son's stepfather since Daniel was less than a year old and has since provided him with a beautiful, brown-skinned little sister. So clearly my son was learning all this racist terminology at home! NOT.

The head and the S.E.N. teacher's jaws just DROP when we walk into the room! Chris puts his iphone onto the table and informs them that he will be recording our conversation today. They look very uncomfortable, but don't say anything. Chris continues "so, what did you want us to sign?" The headteacher blurts out "Oh that's really not necessary Mr ***** - we've looked into the incident further (what, over the weekend?!) and found Daniel to be innocent so you can consider the matter dropped".
Chris: "And there'll be nothing on my stepson's file labelling him as a racist, now will there?"
Headmistress: "No, no - absolutely not. the matter has been resolved. And Daniel, we are very sorry you were upset on Friday. We will be keeping a close eye on Darryl and making sure that he doesn't bother you any more."
Chris: "Good. Okay then lets go - I need to ring ma'nigger Rusty before I go back to work".

I JEST, I JEST!!! :-D Of course that last sentence never happened, but the rest is all 100% true. And funnily enough, Dan's not had any trouble since then...
(Clonk, Tue 26 Feb 2013, 12:03, 10 replies)

Rabid political correctness
never seems to do anything positive.

I like this story.
(username failed moderation, Tue 26 Feb 2013, 12:39, closed)

Nice
I feel sorry for the kids without massive black stepfathers
(thefuckestuppest cheapened this, on, Tue 26 Feb 2013, 13:13, closed)

He plays the Race Card,
you play the Ace of Spades*.

*Sorry.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 26 Feb 2013, 14:13, closed)

Well played!
Nicely done.
(SpangoTheWonderBadger is brewing beer, Tue 26 Feb 2013, 16:07, closed)

Any fule kno, "Dirty Darryl" isn't racist
Now "Darky Darryl", that would have been racist.

Well-played to you and your family, I hope (but doubt) that the school has learned from this.
( Ghoti Fingers, Tue 26 Feb 2013, 20:00, closed)

toastie...
At school I knew a half white half Asian girl who was a gorgeous tan colour. She wanted to be called "toastie" so we did.

First time a teacher heard it the whole class was hailed in for political correctness training even though she loudly protested that she asked us to call her that.

The head mistress even told her, the "victim" that she would "understand it when she was older".
(Smegma, Tue 26 Feb 2013, 21:45, closed)

Haha - thanks all...
...sad to say, it's probably happened to few other kids/parents since. Wouldn't even surprise me if this sort of thing was about hitting targets! But probably just a massively, overly P.C. over-reactive load of bollocks!!! :-s
(Clonk, Tue 26 Feb 2013, 21:43, closed)

Or maybe it's because the schools would wind up in an awful lot more trouble if they responded to accusations of racism
with a resounding "meh!"? Probably difficult to strike the right balance when faced with one pupil's word against another, so it's not too hard to see why they'd chose to err on the side of caution. Doesn't make it right, mind.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 26 Feb 2013, 23:08, closed)

True say!
You are right - it was more that the school had done just that - believed one boys version of events over the others, thus getting it spectacularly wrong in the process. An own goal from them there - they probably should have been a lot more tactful than they were. I was more annoyed that the lesson all this taught my son, was that people have the right to give him stick and lie about him but that he shouldn't bother standing up for himself as he won't be believed anyway! His confidence was quite knocked there, so it took some undoing on our part. But absolutely, the school(s) should always investigate! Thankfully, the S.E.N. teacher has buggered off and retired now, the old HAG!!! :-D
(Clonk, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 1:52, closed)

Rereading your story and spotting the "couple of years ago",
it is quite shocking to find a school still struggling to handle such an incident. I doubt that the SENCo will be missed.
I hope your son recovered his confidence (I wonder if Darryl learnt anything from the experience?).
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 11:17, closed)