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This is a question It's Not What It Looks Like!

Cawl wrote two years ago, "People seem to have a knack for walking in at just the wrong time:
"Well, my clothes got wet, so did his... Yes, officer, huddling together to conserve body heat... Yes officer, he's five... No Officer... I'm not his Dad."

What have you done that, in retrospect, you'd really rather nobody had seen, mostly as things just get worse the more you try to explain it?

(, Thu 9 Dec 2010, 21:56)
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Apparently a good way to get a dirty look at the supermarket
is to get a load of alcohol, and a single packet of nappies. At the checkout ask them how much the nappies are. When they tell you the price, decide not to buy them.
(, Fri 10 Dec 2010, 22:26, 9 replies)
but they come in handy
when you're drunk and you shit yourself
(, Fri 10 Dec 2010, 22:28, closed)
This is brilliant!
I may try it tomorrow but replace the nappies with a cheap bottle of wine
(, Fri 10 Dec 2010, 22:35, closed)

So I was in Tesco, and went up to the counter with a Hannah Montana DVD, Vaseline, tissues and cheap jeans.

The woman at the till then gave me a very funny look.

I then got very embarrassed.

That's the last time I buy clothes from Tesco
(, Sat 11 Dec 2010, 0:05, closed)

Naah. Nappies, and condoms.
And put back the condoms.
(, Sat 11 Dec 2010, 0:29, closed)
And this is relevant to the qotw how?

(, Sat 11 Dec 2010, 2:20, closed)
Similar to the one I heard
You find a female/easily shockable-looking cashier and put these items on the conveyor belt in this order:


Bolognese sauce

Lasange pasta sheets



Nice bottle of wine



Several large cumcumbers

Then watch their face change from "Aww" to "Eww".
(, Sat 11 Dec 2010, 3:01, closed)
Or they might react completely differently...
There's a very chatty girl in my local Sainsbury's who seeing me buy 2 packets of butter, said "I expect you'll be cooking with the other one?"

What could I reply but: "Both actually, but I've got plenty of olive oil."

Her laugh dislodged several spiders from the ceiling.

And yes, if I were 20 years younger and not married, I absolutely would.
(, Sat 11 Dec 2010, 9:50, closed)
Pre-made bolognese sauce.

You disgust me.
(, Sat 11 Dec 2010, 9:53, closed)
All credit to Ed Byrne
It's one of his best
(, Sun 12 Dec 2010, 15:21, closed)

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