1. "Deffo."
I know a lot of people use this because (a) they're too lazy to type "definitely" or (b) they're too afraid of the repercussions of spelling "definitely" incorrectly, but have you tried saying "deffo" out loud? It makes you sound like a complete fucking bell-end.

2. "Random."
No it isn't. If we actually studied your "kerr-azy" friend's "random" behaviour, I think you'd soon realise it was, in fact, tiresomely predictable.

3. "Gotten."
I nearly put down a book and refused to read any further after encountering the word "gotten" in the foreword. I'm glad I gave it the benefit of the doubt and overlooked this affront to me eyes, as it has turned out to be a very interesting book, but it was touch and go for a few minutes.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 11:48, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

God, I hate the misuse of the word "random".
"He randomly shouted at me"

No, he didn't randomly shout at you. He shouted at you because you're an insufferable little prick. That's not random behaviour, it's entirely justified.

Hate, hate, hate.
( Kroney, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 11:52, Reply)

Exactly. Behaving like a "zany" helmet is not "random," it's just "behaving like a helmet."
A sudden onset of multiple sclerosis, now that might make your behaviour a little closer to being "random." And I'd probably find it far funnier.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 11:56, Reply)

I can spell 'definitely', but I'm Scouse, and we like to say "deffo kidda".

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 11:52, Reply)

Ah, fair enough - most of the people I've seen use it have been distinctly Southern
And therefore their (hypothetically) saying it out loud would make them sound like objectionable rugger-buggers discussing a trip to the biscuit tin.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 11:54, Reply)

Deffo is fine, loads of people use it now. Language changes just accept it before you
become one of those twunts who writes into the paper whinging.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:01, Reply)

language changing is fine
but saying "deffo" makes you sound like a penis.

so does using twitter

I hope these things go away and do it soon.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:03, Reply)

just because loads of people use it
doesn't mean it's right. Simples for example- lots of people use it, doesn't mean I don't want to committ violent assault on each and every one of them
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:06, Reply)

I'm with you there
things naturally entering the language are ok (within reason) but having something fucking shoehorned by wanker advertising people is not fucking on.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:07, Reply)

Loads of people can't spell "definitely."
Loads of people watch the X-factor and Jeremy cunting Kyle.
Loads of people believe Cheryl Cole's marital status is a matter of national importance.
Loads of people believe that the next fad diet will be the one to shift their excessive weight, despite the previous twelve not having worked.

Basically,. 'loads of people' do loads-upon-myriad-loads of tremendously fucktarded things. Should I bow to the masses?
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:06, Reply)

Not on all things no, but the language issue yes.
Things like 'simples' etc are just fads and won't hang around forever.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:13, Reply)

Won't they? You still use a "hoover" to clean your flat, don't you?
It's probably safer not to underestimate the insidious power of branding and advertising and batter that meerkat and its creators to death whilst we have the chance.

As for the language issue: there has to be a point at which you say "no more." Granted, our language in its present state, its various idioms and even its spellings, have shifted quite considerably over the last couple of hundred years.

However, when these changes are down to people being incapable of spelling a word, or even using it correctly, there is naturally going to be a resistance to this change. If we let every little variation become "standard," and just lay back to accept it, as your badly-punctuated reply suggests, the meanings and spellings of words could very quickly be corrupted to different extents in different regions of the country until we no longer had a standard, accepted language.

It is a triumph of a society and its culture that, whatever regional variations you might apply to your own speech, if you have at least learnt the accepted form of the language, you can communicate with anybody who has learnt the same. This is why we resist these changes: because although language does indeed evolve, each change must be carefully evaluated for the threat it poses to this achievement in communication.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:23, Reply)

well said

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:27, Reply)

tl:dr
But for the record, no, I use the vacuum cleaner.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:30, Reply)

sellotape

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:32, Reply)

Sticky back plastic mate. Other brands are available.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:42, Reply)

Ahh, but what about the fridge?

(Cave Duck, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 12:35, Reply)

I really do wonder who or what has showered such acrid piss on your chips recently...

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 13:36, Reply)

I hate 'random' people
Surely 'spontaneous' would be more accurate, if they were actually being 'random', rather than planning what they do.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 14 Dec 2010, 11:59, Reply)