Death and the Merchant
My short story Death and the Merchant is now available for free online.

It's inspired by the Somerset Maugham story The Appointment in Samarra.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 7:37, 14 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

if you're looking for CC
I'd have to point out that the tone is uneven. The 'law of ironic come-uppance' doesn't really gel in tone with the thoughtful last line.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 8:27, Reply)

You are no SpankyHanky, that's for sure.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 8:31, Reply)

Praise indeed!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 8:38, Reply)

He is brave enough to post it here, so deserves some praise.
My only criticism is that the dialogue is a rather tortured and modern. He seems to want to use long words with deep meanings, but the original piece uses simple words and brevity to hit home with more power.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 8:46, Reply)

I'm not sure what you mean.
There aren't really any 'big words' in the story.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 16:34, Reply)

comeuppance
I'm trying to visualize simple people from long ago, but I am reading something from anotehr time.

Just a minor point really, If I hadn't read the original, I may have thought differently.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 17:37, Reply)

I suppose we could do a series of short stories like Baby Shoes For Sale.
- Never mind, leftovers tomorow.
- "And whatever she's having".
- I'm sorry to inform you.
- KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN !
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 8:36, Reply)

I'm actually going
to release a collection of stories of less than 140 characters soon. It's called 'Two-Fisted Tweets'.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 18:44, Reply)

I saw death once; I laughed in his face and then ran him over in my Honda Accord
while his super model girlfriend fellated me.

Though i hardly remember it as I'd taken sooo many massive drugs
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 8:38, Reply)

bone thin she was

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 8:42, Reply)

With a musky anus

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 9:28, Reply)

'There was once...'
Is a weak start to a story. The rest holds promise.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 8:47, Reply)

...and then I woke up

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 8:48, Reply)

I think the website might have edited it.
It's meant to start 'Once upon a time...'
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 8 Feb 2011, 16:54, Reply)