I have recently been subjected to a one in/one out rule on my DVDs by Ms Foxtrot
which is fucking killing me. The other day HMV had a 4-film Hitchcock collection for £10. I didn't own any of the films in question but knew that buying it would mean I'd have to get rid of 4 current DVDs. This is fucking appalling.

Alt: my favourite mug is on my desk in front of me, it's a Nottingham Forest mug with my (real) name on it. Don't pretend you're not all absurdly jealous. I knows you is. Innit.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:03, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

tell her the same applies when she buys clothes

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:08, Reply)

That would be a superb idea
if she didn't have The Power Of Sexban
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:10, Reply)

Is she a heavy sleeper?
Sexban nullified!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:11, Reply)

You're so wrong it goes all the way back round into right
Impressive work mate
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:32, Reply)

You get more pathetic every day

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:15, Reply)

You so want me
I assume we're throwing baseless, unkind statements at each other
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:29, Reply)

No I want to be able to buy as many DVDs as I want
oh wait I can
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:40, Reply)

why not try the power of "Compromise works both ways, you relentless harridan"?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:20, Reply)

^This
Why would she want you to get rid of DVDs anyway?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:25, Reply)

Because they are all frankly disturbing brutal gay porn.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:26, Reply)

3/10
Points lost for inaccuracy. It's all entirely consensual.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:30, Reply)

Storage, an' that
She's not a film buff and therefore doesn't understand
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:27, Reply)

But even if she's not a film buff
She must understand by now that you are?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:30, Reply)

The more I talk about this
the more I think I'm being hard done by here
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:31, Reply)

I'd say so

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:33, Reply)

You are
You should march home tonight, show her this thread and say "Look, bitch! The internet says I can keep my DVDs!". She can't argue with that, surely?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:33, Reply)

I actually have an absolute fuckload of boyfriend points at the minute
so now might be the time to strike. I may take a few liberties with your wording, though
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:37, Reply)

I don't think you should change a thing
It'll totally work. Do it!
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:41, Reply)

OK but I'm crediting you as author
She can be in Bradford in five hours
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:46, Reply)

Assuming you finish work at 6
That would mean she arrived in Bradford when I was at work. I keep things to help me out if I'm ever attacked behind the bar. She can bring it.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:54, Reply)

She's a pacifist
That up there is possibly the emptiest threat since the French told Germany in 1919 that if they ever tried invading them again they'd kick the fuck out of them
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:57, Reply)

You're right
I'd probably just laugh.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Thu 3 Mar 2011, 13:00, Reply)

She can be quite scary when she loses her temper
Hard to know what you could do to provoke such a reaction though.

Well, apart from THAT
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 13:05, Reply)

Excuse me
I am much scarier when I lose my temper.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Thu 3 Mar 2011, 13:10, Reply)

I really doubt that. I'm sure you are, but an angry Ms Foxtrot is not something I ever want to see again
More to the point, in THAT circumstance she'd be angry and you wouldn't
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 13:14, Reply)

OH
I didn't understand what you were talking about. Pervert.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Thu 3 Mar 2011, 13:15, Reply)

Couldn't you have just assumed?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 13:16, Reply)

point
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 13:03, Reply)

Hahaha
7/10. You're on scorching form today
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 13:06, Reply)

it seems to me that she doesn't care about his interests
probably because it is a sham relationship.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:31, Reply)

In all fairness you don't really need four copies of flashdance

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:39, Reply)

This will amaze you
but I've never actually seen Flashdance. I've seen the infamous welding/dancing sequence and heard the songs. That's all you need, isn't it?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:45, Reply)

What about Footloose?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:51, Reply)

Ah
I, er, may have seen Footloose quite recently, on the way back from a Ballroom Dancing competition in Blackpool

and I am in no way looking forward to the remake. Nope. Not even a little bit.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:55, Reply)

*sigh*
Hitch
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:12, Reply)

Right then
5/10 not bad but below your usual standards. Bonus point for acknowledging with a sigh that such pasttimes represent no challenge
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:28, Reply)

*sigh*
DVDs bumhole
Ms Foxtrot a stream of nameless homosexuals in my local park
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:14, Reply)

This is more like it
8/10. Imaginative and witty. Click.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Mar 2011, 12:29, Reply)