I like this
I especially like that you didn't bother to explain. You know if you ever have a son the only appropriate middle name for him is Judas.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:44, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Hahahahah
But seriously, No more kids!
( Peej, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:45, Reply)

You have to
I'm not allowed
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:48, Reply)

It's not the kids so much
more the pregnancies that 2 now where we have spend many days in hospital with various problems but ended up with 2 healthy kids. I'm not sure either of us can go through it all again.

Plus we have a three bedroomed house so no-one has to share. One room for the wife, one for each of the kids and the sofa or shed for me.
( Peej, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:50, Reply)

You get the sopha if you've been a good boy?
I'm now thinking about getting pregnant, but reading all those pregnancy pages is making me scare. It's a wonder human race is still here, having into account all the suffering women have to go through for each baby. Why would they repeat?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:53, Reply)

My wife has been absolutely fine so far
No morning sickness, no stretch marks, no backache...4 months to go though!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:57, Reply)

she's not pregnant
just fat
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:59, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:01, Reply)

I have to concur with Dr Vipros
Your wife likes food and is afraid you'll dump her on account of your crippling shallowness
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:01, Reply)

ing shallow
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:03, Reply)

Lucky her
One of my friends didn't feel a thing. All the other 4 went through different types and levels of pain, fainting, vomiting... And then, the delivering, just to finish it well.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:02, Reply)

Depending on how naughty you've been

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:54, Reply)

If I'm really naughty
she makes me sleep in the same bed as her.
( Peej, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:01, Reply)

Bet she moans too
Why am I doing this?!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:06, Reply)

hello champ
I especially like that you didn't bother to explain. You know if you ever have a son the only appropriate middle name for him is Judas. the feel of a mans balls slapping against my arse
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:48, Reply)

6/10
You can do better. You know you can.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:50, Reply)

I know, but I'm sooo tired
hangover has passed, but it's left me weak and a bit moany
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:51, Reply)

Allow me
tired far in the closet I can see Narnia
angover eterosexuality
a bit moany unable to resist the various shipmates of HMS Julian Clary, just docked for shore leave and eager for fresh meat
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:56, Reply)

tired far in the closet I can see Narnia
angover eterosexuality
a bit moany unable to resist the various shipmates of HMS Julian Clary, just docked for shore leave and eager for fresh meat
to bugger you
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 14:57, Reply)

Hahaha
7/10. Back on form
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:00, Reply)

you missed one in the previous thread as well

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:02, Reply)

I was completely absent for the previous thread
Details?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:06, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1155023
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:08, Reply)

Not bad at all
Have another 7/10. Welcome back.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:12, Reply)

much obliged

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:13, Reply)

There seems to be little point in continuing the scoring
given that last time I published the rankings I was trolled half to death.

Still quite a giggle though I suppose.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:15, Reply)

I'm not going to lie
it is stupid and pointless, but then there is little on here that isn't.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:17, Reply)

I only started rating the jibes to show I had a sense of humour about the whole thing
Unfortunately, I like scores and tables an' that
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:21, Reply)

Darth! Darth!
I looked at the website for the half marathon today. When are we going to make this official?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:24, Reply)

my old boss is running that stupid load of marathons in the Sahara at the moment
the crazy bastard
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:27, Reply)

I foresee three problems, Jugs
1) Neither of us possesses the haberdashery skill to make an outfit that resembles a skyscraper or a plane
2) If we did, or could find people who do, and the outfits are made and worn, we will be either beaten to death by an angry public or made into national hate figures, possibly both
3) I might be in Argentina on September 11th.

MIGHT is the operative word, but Ms Foxtrot is very keen. Making it official might be premature. Am still up for a half-marathon though.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:28, Reply)

I fucking hate you and I hope you get Argentinian bum AIDS disease
I've been so good these last three weeks running at least every other day and now you drop this bombshell. I'm going to burn my running shoes and post you the ashes scattered over photos of myself eating kebabs.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:30, Reply)

So you don't fancy another one a couple of weeks later then?
Well done on the running, how far are you going now?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:31, Reply)

I ran two miles in 19.30 on the treadmill last night
EDIT - where is the other one?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:33, Reply)

Actually, there is one in London on the 25th September
I think I might do that
(Bazongaloid, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:35, Reply)

Good work
The Great North Run is on the 18th of September, so we could get Sportscow to come cheer us on and possibly call him a slovenly wretch as we fly past on our winged feet of fleetness, and there's one in London on the 25th
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:39, Reply)

to the kebab shop and back

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:34, Reply)

es and tables an' that ing with men
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:25, Reply)

6/10
Not bad, previous efforts today were better.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 7 Apr 2011, 15:28, Reply)