A cock-gaz.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 8:37, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I can vouch for this

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 8:38, Reply)

Wait a sec, what, what? she's got to send me a cock gaz?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 8:39, Reply)

What if I'm not big enough, she'll have a chance to laugh and show all her mates and go "Aww bless, aren't you adorable ! Here's 50p, go get some sugar, honey."
Where as if I'm in the room with her and the willy is out and primed for action, then she'd feel more obligated to do something with it.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 8:41, Reply)

What if it's so big that she thinks "Oh gosh, I could never use that, it would be like going down on a telephone poll, this'll never work out, I'm sorry, here's 50p, go get some sugar, honey."

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 8:44, Reply)

Gaz her someone else's cock if you're worried.
Lenny Henry's, perhaps?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 8:56, Reply)

Or mine.
It's fucking massive.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 9:03, Reply)

Massive, but with mottled green markings like a pustulent gecko.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 9:04, Reply)

It definitely smells like a big one.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 9:06, Reply)

I reckon I'm probably about the same size as a white Andi Peters, so maybe with a bit of photoshop magic.
I wouldn't want to post Lenny Henry's cock super imposed over my crotch with me doing a thumb's up motion to the camera while smiling, perhaps on a beach at sunset, 'cus that's romantic isn't it? Girls like a bit of that, don't they?....because if we're ever at a sunset, she'll know that I doctored the photographs and when she asks me where I got my penis from, I'd have to be honest and say "OK, I'll come straight, I got it from Lenny Henry" and she'll go "That is one unfunny prick you've got there", and I'll say "Yeah', I know, I hear someone else is doing comic relief this year, so it might be alright this time."
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 9:14, Reply)

Two words
Forever single.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Haha, oh man, it's true, haha, I can apprechate a life-burn like that.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 25 Aug 2011, 9:18, Reply)