Boredom. And Angry Birds while pretending to be shitting.
Alt: The Christmas Curry with all the men from one branch of the family. My uncles, dad, cousins and cousin-in-laws. It's the best bit.

Alt alt: I'm not fucking off. There's only just over a week to go.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 8:56, 1 reply, 14 years ago)

Pretending to be shitting?
Although I must say I did once pretend to have the squits to get out of doing something I didn't really fancy on holiday.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 15 Dec 2011, 8:59, Reply)

Fucks sake DG
You're married to her now, you're going to have to sleep with her eventually.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:01, Reply)

I wondered how long it would take...
it was some crappy water park, akshully. It looked... unsafe.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:03, Reply)

I was going to do it as a narrative, but I couldn't be arsed.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:09, Reply)

Nothing wrong with pretending to be shitting.
Thats how I got so good a Tetris again.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:07, Reply)

I now imagine that your poo comes out shaped like Tetris blocks
Everyone appreciates the long straight one
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:10, Reply)

Those massive square ones are a nightmare I tell you.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:11, Reply)

You need lube
Or just a spot of... loosening
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:14, Reply)

From you that sounds like an offer.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Is that the sound of Darth stepping up to the plate I hear?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Is this Darth offering to help?

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Has anyone mentioned that this sounds like you are offering?

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:19, Reply)

I'd like to join in the suggesting that this is Darth offering to help.
I'm not sure what it means though because I know nothing about bumming and bummers.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:20, Reply)

Pfft
Yeah...of COURSE you don't
(Kid Presentable, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:21, Reply)

This is definitely not an offer
*holds out palm, waits for it to be crossed with silver*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:25, Reply)

silver cock

Hur hur
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:27, Reply)

Fuck yeah.
I get two or three extra half hour breaks out of the "shitting" scam.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Thu 15 Dec 2011, 9:14, Reply)