GET MARRIED
I hear that's the solution to all of the above
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:37, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I AM married.
I just don't see my wife any more.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:39, Reply)

Sounds like the perfect arrangement.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:40, Reply)

It's better than when we lived together!!!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:42, Reply)

I'm married
and I can categorically state that it is not. But I think you knew that, Trotter.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:39, Reply)

Not first-hand
but I had my suspicions
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:44, Reply)

You know how at the moment
Mrs Foxtrot makes you basically do what she says and in return she occasionally lets you have sex with her?
Well it's a bit like that, only without the sex.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:47, Reply)

truthlols

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:48, Reply)

*makes joke about wife dying and washing up piling up*
But the sex is the same.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:55, Reply)

Good job she's not fussed about marriage then
You forget that her main purpose is to make me look straight. Well, straighter.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:54, Reply)

Than what?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:55, Reply)

8

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:56, Reply)

Ambitious

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 18 Jan 2012, 13:57, Reply)

*Nods in agreement*

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 18 Jan 2012, 14:06, Reply)