the fact that i did not know what you meant is a GOOD THING for me

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:15, 1 reply, 13 years ago)

just cos you didn't know what it was called doesn't mean you don't have a trouser skirt wedged halfway up your poo-crusty arse right now

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:16, Reply)

i have a short linen a-line skirt over sheer tights with a seam up the back
and my arse is smooth and non-crusty as a baby's tit.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:19, Reply)

i didn't fucken ask you attention whoring slagbag

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:19, Reply)

who cares
now the image is stuck in your little peabrain
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:23, Reply)

no it fucken isn't
i saw blah blah my tits blah blah belly overhanging my jeans blah blah OMG SOMEBODY LOVE ME
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:25, Reply)

one day we really must talk about your terror of being alone
and why you now cling onto a fictitious farting doughball despite having failed one marriage already. it's not good, really.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:27, Reply)

at least someone loved me enough to marry me
that biological clock of yours won't hold out much longer you know
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:28, Reply)

this is where you are wrong
she clearly thought you were a better bet than you turned out to be, and backed a different horse.

biological clock my arse. i've got hundreds of nieces and nephews, put me off that shit for life!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:29, Reply)

and yet nobody is ever going to bet on you at all :(

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:32, Reply)

how much did that abortive wedding cost you?
man, that must have sucked.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:38, Reply)

father of the bride pays, innit

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:40, Reply)

bet you paid at least a third
imagine what you could have done with all that money now.

all £100 of it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:42, Reply)

i could have bought you about 20 gallons of slimfast

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:42, Reply)

it wouldn't have brought your neck back

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:43, Reply)

it might've got you a boyfriend you could keep tho

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:44, Reply)

why would you want to keep the same one forever and ever and ever
when you could have new ones from time to time?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:47, Reply)

i dunno, love and a deep, meaningful commited relationship as opposed to a quick spurt with a man who won't look you in the eye

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:48, Reply)

yes yes
but after a few months or years, that gets boring.

and people get divorced.

you should know, neckless.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:56, Reply)

i'd rather be a monogamist than a nonogamist

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:58, Reply)

yeah but someone married Al and you two are the most loathsome cunts I've ever come across. You can't trust people to make smart decisions.
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:34, Reply)

oh look, its Rachelswipe's future husband to the rescue
look Obi Wan, it isn't my fault that you've failed to look after yourself and ended up an amorphous mess
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:35, Reply)

Swipe doesn't need rescuing pal I just felt like getting involved. You know you're a tosser.
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:37, Reply)

nothing in this thread has upset me until just now :'(

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:39, Reply)

*unzips*
keep going...
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:23, Reply)

we're not related
you're not the real bert
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:24, Reply)

Alright, 'Swipes?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:27, Reply)

hello sexbomb

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:28, Reply)

How are tricks?
Had all my holiday jabs this morning so have a dead arm:-(

And got a bollocking off the nurse this morning. Ho-hum.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:31, Reply)

could be worse
you could be quentin and have a dead brain

was the nurse at least hot and slutty?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:38, Reply)

Sadly, she was old and Irish. And slutty.
Good weekend?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:40, Reply)

i am now thinking about catherine tate
am i close?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:42, Reply)

cheers swipe, this thread made my day

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:40, Reply)

the braindead are easily pleased

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:42, Reply)

you fuck coma patients?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Mar 2012, 14:44, Reply)