Isn't your aunt 'Mother Brass' or something?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 May 2012, 21:58, 2 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Someone has to ensure the girls are well stocked with condoms, tissues and lube.
It's fairly mundane work for poor Baz.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 14 May 2012, 22:02, Reply)

That's my my mum's aunt.
I've never met her. God I want it to be Thursday now so, so badly.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 14 May 2012, 23:03, Reply)

Alright Baz.
How is back up north treating you?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 May 2012, 23:26, Reply)

hey you
where ya been?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 14 May 2012, 23:31, Reply)

Post work pint, innit.
What have you been doing? And has there been any joy from your last gaz?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 May 2012, 23:32, Reply)

Not yet. Still waiting.
A couple of others added to the pile though.

Has work sorted itself out yet?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 14 May 2012, 23:33, Reply)

Nah, it's all up in the air still.
Never mind.

Any other news from the coast? How is the world of the Happy Biscuit treating you?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 May 2012, 23:36, Reply)

I'm working steadily at it
but I'm not sure if I'm getting the traffic. I might look into this facebook advert thing that Gonz is talking about. I'm getting a fair bit of spam comments though.

The coast, as always, is a den of drugs and chavity.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 14 May 2012, 23:38, Reply)

You need to set yourself up as a friendly drug dealer.
Put a smile on a smackheads face.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 May 2012, 23:43, Reply)

I'm not sure there's really a market for that here...

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 14 May 2012, 23:47, Reply)

You could get yourself a beach front shop
And sell pineapple rock, ice-cream and powder.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 May 2012, 23:48, Reply)

Yum.
When are you coming back for another go at the pier then?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 14 May 2012, 23:49, Reply)

Depends.
Depends on when you have a worthy rival for the OT crazy-golf crown.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 May 2012, 23:55, Reply)

Nobody wanted to come to pierbash 2.
I can only assume that it's because they all hate me.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 14 May 2012, 23:56, Reply)

Or because you only had it in the calendar for 5 minutes before you canned it.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 May 2012, 23:59, Reply)

I only canned it because everyone said they couldn't make it!
After having first told me that weekend was fine.
*sulks*
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 May 2012, 0:00, Reply)

Why not float the idea to see what works.
And then, if there is enough 'so if I go for 'x' date, you'll be able to make it?' type confirmation, put it in the calendar.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:02, Reply)

Back up north?
I only just got back down to London geezer. Although I'm so bored I might go back up earlier than I planned. In fact I'm stupidly bored all of the time now, I don't actually know what to do. It worries me.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 14 May 2012, 23:48, Reply)

Have you braved the kitchen yet?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 14 May 2012, 23:50, Reply)

Give Monty a call.
He can take you on a tour of drugs you never really fancied.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 14 May 2012, 23:55, Reply)

I'm done with that shizzle, yo.
Unless it's with the doris and we're just chilling at hers with a load of bugle and red wine. Then I'm in.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:01, Reply)

You sound smitten mate.
When are you seeing her again, next?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:02, Reply)

Thursday.
Was tomorrow but she's got to work late now. I'm so unbelievably paranoid all of the time that I'm trying to work out whether she's just lost interest. I need to get out of my head but I've been stuck in there permanently for twenty one years so it's quite hard.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:05, Reply)

After that amount of time, I'm amazed it's still hard and hasn't yet gone off.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:11, Reply)

Stop joking I'm a nervous wreck here.
I'm also a fucking idiot for being like this. I'm like a petulant child who needs constant validation.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:13, Reply)

Baz.
You're the best dressed man of OT, and you've been validated by being the winner of 'most like to meet' at JeffStock I.

What else do you want?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:15, Reply)

You make me smile Jeffers, although her texting me back would also be nice.
It's fine, it's fine. I just need to occupy myself. Sitting around the house all day doesn't help, I'm looking forward to working tomorrow. I can stop this nonsense then.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:22, Reply)

Take the dog out for a walk.
And then leave a bag of dog shit by the Jacko memorial at The Cottage.

You know it makes sense.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:24, Reply)

I walked the dog three times today.
Such was my boredom/paranoia/level of worry. Although walking her to Craven Cottage would be a bit of a stretch.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:29, Reply)

You could post the shit?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:30, Reply)

I don't pick up my dog's poo.
So I ain't sending any of it either.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:36, Reply)

Listen to some camp tunes.
That'll sort you out.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 15 May 2012, 0:40, Reply)

Oh, you're in the right place here then...

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 15 May 2012, 0:19, Reply)