b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Off Topic » Post 1689726 | Search
This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1

« Go Back | See The Full Thread

A mysterious fluid has appeared on my keyboard
Is it coming from me? If not, then who? Where is it coming from, and why?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:26, 5 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
Also, met several famous people in my life time
But the most recent sighting was in London a few months ago when I walked past Eastenders star Jill Halfpenny.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:27, Reply)
Would.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:29, Reply)
Likewise
Also, she's shorter than I thought she would be.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:31, Reply)
That's works for me.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:35, Reply)
I was the same with Rachel Stephens
Never fancied her when I thought she was tall. Is that weird?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:37, Reply)
Perfectly normal
For a nonce.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:37, Reply)
Oh boy
I keep falling into this trap don't I. SHEESH!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:41, Reply)
No, it's natural to prefer women that you can beat up

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:38, Reply)
I don't want to beat her up
I just want to cover her in butter and use her as a loofah
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:42, Reply)
Surely covering her with butter would render her ineffectual as a loofah.
I would think that you would need something to make her more abrasive.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:52, Reply)
Wow, I really haven't thought this through
Maybe I'll just have sex with her. Seems less complicated.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:53, Reply)
Battered's a midget. I suppose you fancy HIM now.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:39, Reply)
I'd fuck a midget
Don't knock it 'til you've tried it, right?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:41, Reply)
How do you know I haven't?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:48, Reply)
Woah
You just blew my mind
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:55, Reply)
I also just blew your dog, but we'll gloss over that.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:00, Reply)
That wasn't my dog....
:(
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:03, Reply)
Just as he 'glossed' over you.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:05, Reply)
It's certainly got a wet nose now, I can tell you.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:06, Reply)
I much prefer her father, Shakin'.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:40, Reply)
I'd hide behind HER green door!
Or...something
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)
I'd like to see Jilly Halfpenny's thruppenies.
DO YOU GET MY PRE-DECIMAL CURRENCY SLASH COCKERNEE RHYMING SLANG JOKE????
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:31, Reply)
Cor, I'd spend half a crown on HER shillings I tell you!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:32, Reply)
I'd fucking groat up her florin ANY DAY!!!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:34, Reply)
Pervert

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:34, Reply)
I'd 'Albert' her 'Square' alright!

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:35, Reply)
I'd 'Bike' her 'Grove' and no mistake etc.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:35, Reply)
She'd be saying 'Ah cannat see, man' after I'd finished with her I CAN TELL YOU.

I'M SUGGESTING THAT I'D SPUNK IN HER EYES WHILST ALSO REFERENCING THE PAINTBALL-RELATED BLINDING SCENE FROM 'BYKER GROVE'!!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:36, Reply)
Ooh Byker

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:37, Reply)
Hasn't your drink and drug addled lifestyle rendered you impotent?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:38, Reply)
Ask your wife. And all her friends.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:42, Reply)
Haha

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:39, Reply)
i saw her in "abigail's party" the other night
she was good.

my companion declared her a MILF.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:41, Reply)
A MILF, eh?
Does a MILF have to literally be a mother, or is it an age thing?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:43, Reply)
on the pornography, it appears to be anyone over 19 :/

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:44, Reply)
Oh, Porn
When will you learn?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:46, Reply)
to be fair if i grew up on a council estate, 19 would be the age of most of the mums i knew

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:49, Reply)
I have a relative
that recently found out that someone that was in her year at school has recently become a grandmother. This relative is only 34. :(
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:53, Reply)
i'm 34 and i'm a great uncle 3 times over, but then i guess i'm the youngest of my family
bit pointless me saying that really
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:05, Reply)
I found it interesting, Q.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:05, Reply)
it was inaccurate, T
I'm not a great uncle, i'm just an uncle.

and a bit of a twat
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:19, Reply)
Being a grandparent at 34 is ri-goddamn-diculous

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:07, Reply)
not my area of expertise
but himjim of this parish assures me that pumas are women between 30-40 and cougars are between 40-50 and MILFS are between 30-50.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:46, Reply)
What's 50+?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:46, Reply)
'damned sexy'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:48, Reply)
i hope you're sitting down for this
GILF
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:48, Reply)
But what if you're not a Granny?
I find this naming convention flawed
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:50, Reply)
if you want to fuck someone who is old enough to be your granny
you've got enough problems without worrying about the legal definitions. imho.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)
GILF

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:49, Reply)
I heard it's like a greggs steakbake cut in half and filled with gravel

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:03, Reply)
Well I like a bit of aggragate

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:06, Reply)
Check the tips of your fingers.
Are they leaking?
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:28, Reply)
Well that was my first thought too
but they seem fine
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:31, Reply)
Listen, sorry about that. Won't happen again.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:29, Reply)
Oh SURPRISE SURPRISE
I turn my back for a second and Monty wanks on my stuff. BRAVO!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:32, Reply)
Soz. I mean it. Sozzers.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:34, Reply)
i preferred the 'sorry TH' comment you deleted :(

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:41, Reply)
Sorry QH

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:43, Reply)
H?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:43, Reply)
Don't offer him drugs

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:50, Reply)
Yeah go on, just a 'ten bag' though OK?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:52, Reply)
Does anyone want to buy a DVD player?
Tenner?
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:01, Reply)
Hahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:05, Reply)
i don't understand your urban narcotic colloquialisms :(

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 10:04, Reply)
Sorry QO

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:43, Reply)
cheers TH

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:44, Reply)
You yawned didn't you, and you didn't cover your mouth did you. Sicko

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:46, Reply)
Hmm...it's possible

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:48, Reply)
I assume you saw a video of a washing machine being crushed and oil leaked from your eyes and you were confused

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)
You wait
As soon as I see the Wizard and he gives me a real heart, THEN you'll be sorry!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 1 Aug 2012, 9:55, Reply)

« Go Back | See The Full Thread

Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1