That thread seems dead.
Anyone around?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 20:50, 47 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Yep.
How are things? We all have stinking colds here, Mrs B went to bed at 7.30 with a tub of hummous and a Westwing box set, I am contemplating eating raw scotch bonnets to sweat it out. In the meantime, I am drinking pinotage, watching James Bond and playing pool on miniclip.

What are you up to?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 20:53, Reply)

Your Doris has gone to bed with a tub of hummous....
If that isn't a 'come and get it' statement, then I don't know what is.

I'm shattered, so I'm watching the football. I might have a beer in a bit. Off 'up north' tomorrow with the Judy.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 20:56, Reply)

Try not to Punch her.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 20:58, Reply)

Trust me, the Mrs & I are both way too ill and gooey to go anywhere near each other. Can't even be bothered to fiddle with her norks.
Speaking of norks, Doris all good?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 20:59, Reply)

Yeah, everything is good cheers.
If you've got the lurgy I had, it was the best part of 3 weeks before I'd finally shifted it.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:04, Reply)

The annoying part is that I think I fucked up a job interview as a result of being a brain dead snot filled shattered idiot.
Extremely annoying.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:10, Reply)

Surely if you were appreciably ill, they'd take that into consideration.
Especially if the interviewing panel were men. They understand the misery of manflu.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:12, Reply)

No, they think he is a snot-nosed bender.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:19, Reply)

Or they might think....
'Hmm, we don't want someone who is always ill'
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:19, Reply)

I am very round.
I currently have the England match on telly, and the Scotland match on teh laptop. I also have alcohol and chocolate. Life - apart from aching ribs - is pretty good tonight.
You know, as long as I don't try to think beyond tomorrow morning.

How's you?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 20:58, Reply)

I broke one rib and cracked another falling on to the edge of the bath whilst pissed. So for a change you have my sympathy, because knackered ribs fucking hurt.
Took four months to heal BTW.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:01, Reply)

Seriously, I went down like a sack of shit.
I don't think they're broken though. Possibly cracked, but I can breathe without any problems. The bruise is awesome though.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:04, Reply)

What did you do?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:05, Reply)

What battered said.
I slipped getting out of the bath, and landed really heavily right on my ribs.

I am a stupid fat spastic. WTN, indeed.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:11, Reply)

Ouch.
You shouldn't have dropped the soap.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:12, Reply)

I shouldn't have washed the fucking bath.
That's why it was so slippery.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:13, Reply)

Thought mine were only bruised at first, to the point I was lugging heavy stuff around the following morning
It was only two weeks afterwards when it still hurt I got them checked out. Ribs are painful for a long time, so get them checked.

Even if they do tell you to lose weight.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:09, Reply)

: (

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:10, Reply)

Yeah, I'm around too.
You alright Jeff? No pub tonight?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:06, Reply)

Not this evening.
I've got the telly on, I might have a beer once I've got a few chores done.

It doesn't have to be pub night every night.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:07, Reply)

Bender.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:10, Reply)

bender sensible.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:12, Reply)

You make a valid point there b3th.
Still suffering, I see.
Alcohol will probably help.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:12, Reply)

Alcohol always helps.
Scarpe told me that.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:13, Reply)

Well it worked out splendidly for him...

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:15, Reply)

He may not have told me that.
I may, in fact, be kidding for comedic purposes.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:15, Reply)

It does though.
Look at poor scarpo, he spent his lunchtime at the fucking Florence Nightingale museum today.
I'd rather be pissed.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:18, Reply)

I'm not suggesting you have a problem or owt.
I'd go to the pub more, if I didn't have kids.
Predictably I have a nice beer and a record playing.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:10, Reply)

What record have you put on?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:11, Reply)

The Clarke-Boland Sextet, Music For the Small Hours.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:15, Reply)

Or 'the Dozer hours', as they are also known

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:18, Reply)

Sounds great.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:20, Reply)

Well, I say 'great' I mean 'fucking shit'

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:20, Reply)

It is fucking great.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:21, Reply)

You spelled 'gay' wrong

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:21, Reply)

'Jeffthedogfucker' is considered an acceptable spelling for 'gay'

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:23, Reply)

BUNCH OF CHEATING WELSH FANNIES
That is all.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:23, Reply)

CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I have just eaten a WHOLE scotch bonnet chilli.

Including the seeds.

Holy fucking shit. Ah Ah Ah.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:36, Reply)

Don't touch your cock.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:37, Reply)

I could melt glass, so NO WAY I shall be 'worshipping at my own alter',

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:41, Reply)

Well, if the idea was to sweat it out, that should certainly work.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:43, Reply)

hahaha
You mentalist.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:44, Reply)

I did this once when some friends thought I wouldn't know what it was.
So I ate it anyway, just to prove a point or summat.
It does make your eyes water a little, but I find you get a very pleasant sensation in your ears.
I may have also been quite stoned at the time.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:44, Reply)

I've moved on to Summer Dawn by Sahib Shihab now.
He also played flute on that last record, fact fans.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:49, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1757464
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:51, Reply)

Have you heard 'A meeting at the river' by Ry Cooder?
mr b3th has a lot of his stuff on import. Really nice mellow evening music.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 21:52, Reply)

can I reccomend Herb Alpert
and his wonderful tijuana brass?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 23:38, Reply)