Grew cress in someone's cup when they went on holiday
Blu-tak a phone down

Minor stuff really
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:47, 2 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

I bet you have one of these on your desk

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:49, Reply)

He wears a Frank Butcher-style revolving bow tie to the Xmas party.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:50, Reply)

I wear it to work, thank you

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:53, Reply)

Not quite

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:53, Reply)

If your phones can unscrew.
A fun little trick is over a month tape 2p coins on the inside until it's very heavy, then one day take them out. It'll be so much lighter that when they answer the phone they'll hit themselves in the head with it.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:51, Reply)

Gosh what fun indeed.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:53, Reply)

Just try and pull a phone away from someone's head when they are on it
Then leave go
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:54, Reply)

do you mean "let go"?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:55, Reply)

'Then leave the company'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:57, Reply)

No

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:06, Reply)

quite apart from this clearly being lolwakilarious
unless you're some kind of muscle-wasted spazmo, that's never going to work. You couldn't possibly get enough 2ps in a phone reciever to make a difference.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:55, Reply)

Course you could.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:58, Reply)

only if you're some kind of musclewrong.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 11:59, Reply)

It's not about your ability to lift it, it's about your expectation of weight.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:00, Reply)

Chompy
I have a large tin in my home office. It contains, at various times, somewhere between nothing and around £50 in coppers and silvers, so weighs between 200g or so and about 3-4kg.

I never know how much is in it until I open it or pick it up. I have a fairly wide window for expectation of weight. However, I have never, ever, hit myself in the face or anywhere else with it. Because I'm not an epic spastic.

I hope this helps.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:11, Reply)

Much less trouble to tie the two bits of handset cord together
so they pick up the whole phone with the handset. Who knows,they might even smack themselves in the head with it lolololololololololol.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:15, Reply)

I tell you
If I ever have the misfortune* to spend a significant amount of time in an office environment with Chompy, I'm treating every piece of office equipment with the respect normally accorded to a testy scorpion balanced on a claymore mine.

*In the spirit of being fair, this is more "misfortune" in the terms of "ending up in an NHS office in MK" rather than being an abuse of the boy Chompy.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:23, Reply)

do you often lift that tin to your ear while doing other things?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:16, Reply)

It's almost liked you've missed the epically obvious piece of baiting going on here.
Almost.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:19, Reply)

I was distracted by this "website"
biased-bbc.com/
(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:21, Reply)

That appears to be "fucking shite"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:23, Reply)

I "concur"

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:25, Reply)

I even bothered to comment.
that's what happens when I've got a report to write by the end of the day.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:26, Reply)

badger these people hardly leave the house, the only muscles that are defined in any way are their thumbs and right wrist

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 27 Nov 2012, 12:01, Reply)