Bought an oven glove from this company in Cornwall
Had a microscopic but distinctly penis-shaped hole in it

Etc

I'm really fucking grumpy today. Who wants a fucking fight.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:30, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

You've scared everyone off with your threats.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:38, Reply)

I am a terrifying bastard
I know you've no reason to be in Norwich since you abducted the Baroness, but I could have sworn I saw you yesterday. I was literally about to say hello to a complete stranger before I realised he was looking at me in a deeply suspicious and slightly fearful way.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:40, Reply)

your new haircut is pretty savage

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:43, Reply)

I have no idea who you are or how you know that
but, I'm only going to take a punt and my apologies if I've misunderstood, I reckon that's not a compliment
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:45, Reply)

There was a feature on it in the Norwich Advertiser.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:46, Reply)

I'm actually going to click this
for overlooking the obvious "phone box flier" joke
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:51, Reply)

How rude!
It's on your fb profile pic innit.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:50, Reply)

Well yeah
but not knowing who you are I don't know if we're FB friends!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:50, Reply)

we're not

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:51, Reply)

And now I know what level of fear to attribute to you

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:51, Reply)

Do you check everyone's facebook profile pictures?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:52, Reply)

I've printed them out to put on my wall

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:53, Reply)

How do I look?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:55, Reply)

infectious

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:57, Reply)

Spreading my good mood with a winning smile.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:58, Reply)

yeah that's what i meant

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:58, Reply)

strikethrough about STDs

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:58, Reply)

He would have a problem checking mine

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:58, Reply)

I'm very pretty

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 17 May 2013, 9:00, Reply)

It's offtopics pet bent spastic by the way.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:51, Reply)

I did wonder
Cheers
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:53, Reply)

*smooch*

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:54, Reply)

I have one of those faces.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:44, Reply)

It was the beard
and the screaming half-dressed woman running away from him, etc
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:45, Reply)

You'd know all about the shape of a hole made by a penis wouldn't you!

( Peej, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:46, Reply)

My poo comes out cock shaped

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 17 May 2013, 8:53, Reply)

Kroney will be on this like a dog on hot chips.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 17 May 2013, 9:00, Reply)