Christ. I hope I get to do this one day, if only women didn't find me so repulsive :(

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:22, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

It's your rebarbative personality, persistent halitosis and deformed face.
Hope this helps kiss kiss.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:23, Reply)

Correct, apart from the face. That should be cast in bronze and preserved for future generations to adore.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:26, Reply)

You look like the offspring of David Gest and rachelswipe.
Fat, Jewish and melty faced.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:29, Reply)

You wear hats because you are going bald.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:32, Reply)

you take SSRIs because you're a tragic lifeprick

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:33, Reply)

I don't anymore, but otherwise TRUFAX

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:34, Reply)

Once the crying jags and the alternating periods of self-starvation and binge eating kick back in you'll be begging your GP to write you a script

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:36, Reply)

Turns out it was just life being horrible for quite long time. It's loads better now thanks.
Yours will always be mediocre because you are a strange eccentric man with no real friends, just people that don't meet you but suffer you online just to pass time.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:39, Reply)

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. this is quite a turnaround.
someone got laid at the weekend, didn't they?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:39, Reply)

Yes five times.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:41, Reply)

FIVE WANKS IN A WEEKEND????
Blimey.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:42, Reply)

YES I WANKED FIVE TIMES IN A WEEKEND

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:45, Reply)

so four fingers and a palm?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:43, Reply)

YES I WANKED FIVE TIMES IN A WEEKEND

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:45, Reply)

this is much more plausible

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:49, Reply)

You dunno what I look like. I'm well handsome and charming.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:53, Reply)

I am not eccentric

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:40, Reply)

That's one thing you akshully are

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:41, Reply)

nah, eccentricity is for posh people

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:43, Reply)

^ obsessed ^

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:33, Reply)

^ fat bitch ^

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:33, Reply)

you mention me a DISPROPORTIONATE amount
i wouldn't do you with someone else's floppy aubergine. accept it. move on.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:35, Reply)

Ditto.
On both counts.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:37, Reply)

yeah
it's not convincing when you go on and on and on about me, dude. change the record, eh?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:38, Reply)

you really need to let it go
When I say 'no fat ginger chicks', I mean it.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:39, Reply)

you guys are so bless together
i can't wait for the episode where you have angry sex and get it out of your system
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:39, Reply)

urrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh
i've seen a pic of him, remember.

not even with yours, mate!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:40, Reply)

yhpccuya

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:41, Reply)

But that was just his cock right? Is that what you mean when you call him bald?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:43, Reply)

no
the head was bald

which means the balls were hairy as feck
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:49, Reply)

That's a nasty thought.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:54, Reply)

THIS IS WHY HE RESORTS TO RODENT LOVE

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Oct 2013, 19:55, Reply)