open mic nights are shit and frequented by Captain Placid 'real music' cunts

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 16:54, 2 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

What's that sound like then, real music?

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 9 Dec 2013, 16:57, Reply)

acoustic guitars
Anything else is 'shit'.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 16:58, Reply)

Oh. Like in Deliverance?

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:00, Reply)

yer

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:01, Reply)

Don't forget the Mongolian nose flutes!
Perhaps the 'DJ' types could do a live set - unplugged and without effects - that'd be something to see.
Or maybe they could just plug in their latest computerised, compressed-to-buggery-plagiarised-shitefest on a stick into the laptop and fuck off to the bar awaiting the adulation of the mentally subnormal deformed cunts who like that sort of thing.

Just sayin'
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:42, Reply)

you clearly have no idea of what you're talking about here

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:43, Reply)

There's a lot more to DJing than you think, Gramps.
You have to have a good ear for beat matching and timing. You need to really know the tunes you are playing and how they mould to another tune.

Several mates of mine also produce their own mixes and compose melodies.

and this is before you add effects to a song to make it sound different.

It's not just hit a button and make bleep bloop noises.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:47, Reply)

How does that work with a screw on plastic ear?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:53, Reply)

Ah, I DJ'd before the deafness took a grip.
I have in the ear ones so could still do it now, no point damaging it further.
Last time I did a set was for my 30th birthday.

Like riding a bike.

But enough about YM.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:56, Reply)

also, it takes a lot more skill to do it properly than it does to learn some basic chords and be able to play acoustic guitar
I am generalizing a bit here, but any old cunt can learn to play wonderwall, house of the rising sun, creep, if you could read my mind etc etc but very few DJs can mix like Jeff Mills.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 18:02, Reply)

I'm in no way a great DJ. I can mix a lot of different genre's etc. butt hat's as far as my talents go.
I like doing it though, as a hobby. Love music, always have done.

I find it harder to do it from a laptop than decks, but practice makes perfect. Vinyl is beyond me!
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 18:16, Reply)

Butt hats!
You benders and your fashionista ways!
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 18:17, Reply)

Jaunty!
I dun a lol
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 18:50, Reply)

you see, the fact that the sync button is eschewed the vast majority of DJs should show that the whole 'memory stick in laptop and then fuck off' thing
Is something that Placid has invented because he has no idea about how electronic music is composed, produced or performed. Or that while there is a lot of cheap shitty chart dance, it bears little resemblance to good stuff. Or the amount of time, effort and skill that goes into good electronic stuff. Or that DJing is a fundamentally different performance paradigm from bands playing live. It's no better or worse (if there things can be defined in such asinine terms), just fundamentally different.

Plus, he's a boring wanker.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 18:27, Reply)

I like all sorts of music, and if you are serious there it's extremely narrow minded and uninformed, and makes you look very old fashioned, with an outdated viewpoint, and a bit of a knob.
Oh yeah, just sayin'
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:48, Reply)

agreeing here
So many fail points it's incredible.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:57, Reply)

I've seen loads of electronic acts playing live.
Also, total failure to explain why 'unplugged' is any better than 'plugged'. I can think of several acts who use traditional instruments who would be totally unable to do 'unplugged' sets.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 18:00, Reply)

They don't sound too different to every other person
that thinks the music they listen to is somehow better than others.
( Kroney, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:00, Reply)

and maybe some hand bells.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:00, Reply)

I'm not shaking hankies for you
or anybody else GJ
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:03, Reply)

Well, your selfish ways will no doubt spoil what was going to be a lovely evening!!

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:07, Reply)

It's like music
only flatter, darker, and served in a glass with a handle.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:40, Reply)

They can be.
This one's pretty good. Alternatively, one could listen to some crappy pre-recorded shit, or some crappy dj. It's good to see live stuff.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 16:59, Reply)

live stuff can be good
But just because it's live doesn't make it any better.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:00, Reply)

And if it's at a pub that invites some prick off the streets
to "perform" in front of their punters, it is invariably quite the opposite.
( Kroney, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:03, Reply)

my local do open mic on Fridays
They have counts playing the banjo. Sweet baby Jesus it's shit.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:16, Reply)

Did you post that with autocorrect on?
Cos, y'know, we can probably cope with a bit of swearing otherwise.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:41, Reply)

I miss Reg when I see that :(

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:42, Reply)

:(

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:45, Reply)

yer
But I left it like that, I sort of like it.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:42, Reply)

I suggest you demand they put on a long black cape before the start banjoing.
for the lulz.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:44, Reply)

Of course not,
it's good to see peoples' interpretations of stuff.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:05, Reply)

To be fair, almost any live performance gets
my appreciation.
I can't do it so them as does is my heroes.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 9 Dec 2013, 17:01, Reply)