you should have a wank
it'd be like somebody else was doing it

somebody with muscular dystrophy
(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:56, 1 reply, 10 years ago)

I dunno about Gormo I couldn't even if I wanted too
My whole arm is like jelly, I'd have to use the other one the put the jelly arm on my cock and move it. It would be like me wanking myself off with someone elses arm.
( Peej, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:58, Reply)

now things have got double-sexy

(old man river possible lesbian, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:59, Reply)

Go on.....

(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 9:59, Reply)

This. They're too dead for anything like that.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:00, Reply)

Like my first 3 kids

( Peej, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:10, Reply)

i fell asleep with my arm up in the air once, no idea how
when i woke up it was so numb that i couldn't feel it, and i couldn't find it with the other arm because it was in the air. i thought something had bitten it off in my sleep.

that very real fear is why i cannot sleep if my foot or any tiny bit is hanging over the edge of the bed. i genuinely think something will bite it. i found out when i was about 25 that my mother used to pounce on an arm or a foot if she saw it sticking out of the cot and kiss it. bloody child abuse, scarred me for life.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:15, Reply)

I once fell asleep after a HEAVY night out with my mouth open
When I woke up, my tongue had almost entirely dried out, was about half the size, hard and brown. I had to pour water into my mouth and swill it round for about 20 mins before I could speak
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:18, Reply)

hahahahaha
also fucking GROSS imagery
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:19, Reply)

It looked like cracked leather

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:24, Reply)

Seriously something else wrong there. Your blood stream should have still carried the water around to the cells contained in your tounge
the outer may have dried out but to shrink to half the size and go hard? I think you probably have the bad aids mate.
( Peej, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:29, Reply)

it would have been all the booze
dehydrating him
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:30, Reply)

This^
A LOT of booze
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:37, Reply)

^not how anatomy works
I fell asleep with my eye open once and it dried out and stung like a bitch when I blinked for about 3 days
( Peej, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:23, Reply)

Back in the contact lens days, I forgot to take them out once
I woke up, able to see but fearing cataracts
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:25, Reply)

Ewwww, I've done that. Not nice, hard to get out as well

( Peej, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:27, Reply)

Yeah
It was like peeling clingfilm off your eyeball
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:37, Reply)

the worst thing i did was to squirt them with the cleaning fluid and then forget to wash them with saline before putting them in
the pain was so dreadful i could hardly open my eyes long enough to get them out, and the whites turned the colour of chopped liver for about 3 hours.

as i'd been in a massive rush to go out, this displeased me greatly. fucking hell they were sore.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:29, Reply)

I get numbness and immobility in my left arm on occasion when sleeping
It's a bugger when you roll over in your sleep, dislocate your own thumb and don't realise until the morning.
Fucking hurts, too
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:19, Reply)