i keep coming up with things for him to do
nice things, like having mates or family over. standard response: fuck you, imma lie on the sofa and do nothing.

I suspect the drugs and hookers will be round before I've even left Gatwick.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 9:53, 2 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

I'm coming to stay with him on one of the nights you're away

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 9:55, Reply)

^drug mule hooker^

(yo man river INVINCIBLE, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:00, Reply)

^ stating the obvious ^

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:01, Reply)

^upwards arrows^

(yo man river INVINCIBLE, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:02, Reply)

<<<<<<<<<<<<<

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:04, Reply)

Bit of pin money, innit.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:02, Reply)

I'll save you some of the quorn chili I made last night.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:02, Reply)

My youngest pointed to a picture of Mo Farah the other day and said "Look a chocolate man!"
haha kids say the funniest things you couldn't make it up!
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:04, Reply)

My niece pointed to a mole on my face when she had just started talking and said 'chocolate' :(

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:06, Reply)

Alright Chesney

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:15, Reply)

I think you mean de niro m8
anyway i think it's fading to skin colour, it isn't a skanky raised one, so it's probably face c&cer but it will look nicer
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:17, Reply)

we went on a cruise one christmas when my nephew was about 18 months old
when he saw the "butler" for our row of cabins, he burst out sobbing and said in terror, "nooooooo black, noooooo." he'd never seen a chocolate man before (well not that he remembered). by the end of the week he fucking LOVED him, they were proper best buddies.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:07, Reply)

You should probably have a long debate with shambles over the relative merits of cruise holidays here

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:15, Reply)

i don't think they have many merits
I'm glad we did it, we had a brilliant family holiday and saw lots of lovely places, but it's not something I'd do again until I'm about 70.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:25, Reply)

next week?

( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 12:41, Reply)

I blame that Lynx advert.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:08, Reply)

I don't know if they broadcast Lynx adverts in the breaks of Peppa Pig

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:14, Reply)

they might if they knew your smelly children were watching

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:15, Reply)

How would they know that?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:18, Reply)

they're watching you through the television

(yo man river INVINCIBLE, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:20, Reply)

Not my telly, they're not
Took the precaution of wrapping it in tin foil, didn't I
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:21, Reply)

because the electricity use goes up in your yurt by 90% when you let them have the telly on for 15 minutes a day
the other 10% is your wife using her mains powered 'personal massager'
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 9 Jun 2015, 10:21, Reply)