The Tooth Fairy
The other morning son #2 got up and as I nagged him to get dressed as he'd be late for school (again) he told me to hang on.

"I've got to check if I've got a pound under my pillow!"

I ignored this and carried on applying the three inches of slap to my face to enable me to face the world and not look like a Terrahawk.

He returned to his bedroom and rummaged about.

He does this a lot.

Generally it involves making stuff and causing mayhem with his twin brother.

Finally I followed him in to nag again about getting dressed.

"Oh no! She didn't take it!"

"Get dressed."

"But I haven't got my pound!"

"Get dressed. You'll be late for school."

"But I haven't got my pound!"

"...."

"Look"

He shows me a large plastic tooth (god alone knows where he found it) which he had secreted under his pillow.

"The Tooth Fairy didn't take it and give me a pound"


I left the room quickly stifling my snorts of derision and laughter.

Bless him.

He'll be eleven in four weeks time.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 8 Dec 2008, 13:53, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

You should leave
some chocolate money and a note saying "try and trick me again and i'll take all of the real teeth next time"
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Dec 2008, 13:59, Reply)

:)
I stopped believing in the Tooth Fairy when it left a note alongside the 20p I got for my first loss.

It was in my mother's handwriting.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 8 Dec 2008, 14:00, Reply)

What!
You mean she didn't have one of the servants do it for her?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Dec 2008, 14:06, Reply)

Nope.
My mother was one of the serving-wenches.

On the upside, the note was on vellum and illuminated in such a way as to make the Lindisfarne Gospels look like childish daubs.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 8 Dec 2008, 14:12, Reply)

So you're the illegitimate offspring
of a serving wench and the land owner?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 8 Dec 2008, 14:13, Reply)

Ah, Nugget #2
He's nothing if not a chancer.

Like when he decided that he was going to sit up front in the car when I collected the boys from school the other week, despite it being against the rules, he calmly gets in the car and belts himself in despite his brother protesting loudly.

And whenever we pass a sweet vending machine it's "Mum, I need 4p for the vending machine" (repeat x14).

Cheeky swine.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 8 Dec 2008, 14:14, Reply)

ha
when my older brother was about 6, he wrote a note to the tooth fairy - asking for a loan! the letter basically asks for £1 (this is in 1976) so that he can take it on holiday, and then promises to give up the very next tooth to fall out. his spelling is hilarious. i found it in an old family album recently, and his missus has framed it on their wall at home.

it starts "deyar ferris" and goes on from there. the best thing is that he goes on to say "so i can take it to scegness. and spend it."

he's now a deputy head/english teacher. the kids would be appalled!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 8 Dec 2008, 15:02, Reply)

@'Swipe
You could have bought most of Skegness itself for a quid in 1976. Hell - you could get a fair chunk of it for that price now.

Possibly.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 8 Dec 2008, 15:04, Reply)

My littlest sister
spent years telling everyone who'd listen that she wanted to be the Tooth Fairy when she grew up. Seemed like easy money to her I suppose, although fuck knows what she planned to do with all the teeth...
(Son of Sam-i-am We're all as mad as hatters here, Mon 8 Dec 2008, 18:47, Reply)