What I learnt today
Never make a bestiality joke in a job interview.
( rofl harris, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 10:18, 20 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Were you going for a job with the RSPCA? If not, cant see why it would be a problem.
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 10:19, Reply)

^^
Said like a true B3tan.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 11 Dec 2008, 10:26, Reply)

you're going to have to elaborate
!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 10:35, Reply)

Yeah, interviewers are bored with these kind of jokes now.
It's like flogging a dead horse.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 10:37, Reply)

I made a bestiality joke
in the pet shop once, in front of my daughter, and it was a real shame too because the shop assistant was a really pretty girl with red hair. Oh well.

I'm hoping that with a name like mrgibbles it was at least a joke about fucking a guinea pig, or else I'll be disappointed.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 10:39, Reply)

ok
So, it was one of those random nonsense HR questions. They showed me some advertisments containing both a male, and female model, and asked which one I preferred. I said neither.

They said, oh - what do you fancy then? Mineral? Animal?

I got a bit flusterred and said I preferred Alsations. There were a few raised eyebrows and for some reason I blurted out that it was because they were "well fit".
( rofl harris, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 10:45, Reply)

Splutter
Thanks.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 11 Dec 2008, 10:56, Reply)

haha!!
Somebody else exists with my awesome talent of supplying unsuitable jokes in long silences!
(darras jeg har en grevling i hodet. Grevling, grevlang, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 10:56, Reply)

jokes in interview
One of the general questions I was once asked was "What's your favourite joke?"

All I could think of was sickipedia;
Paedophile in woods, little girl comes past.
Girl: "Mister, I can't find my dog."
Paedo: "It's just not your day is it?"

However, I suddenly remember a safe joke.

How do you know if there are 4 elephants in your fridge?
There's a mini parked outside.

It requires a bit of previous knowledge and probably made him feel intelligent when he started chuckling.

Still didn't get the job though.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 11:04, Reply)

Two parrots sitting on a perch
One of them says, "Can you smell fish?"

It takes a minute usually and if the interviewer gets it, they'll like you for making them feel clever.

If you have to explain it, just leave.
You're not getting the job and you dont want to work there anyway.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 11:21, Reply)

^ yay i got it ^
i feel clever now!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 12:28, Reply)

@rs
Yay!

Any interest in taking a nationwide class-action suit against the TV licence?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 12:39, Reply)

update
I've just been offered the job!

I am comprised almost entirely of win.
( rofl harris, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 12:55, Reply)

congrats!
*first*
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 12:55, Reply)

smug mode engaged
Cheers
( rofl harris, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 12:57, Reply)

Pay
your fucking TV license you tight bastard. If I lose the BBC then I'm blaming you.
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 13:04, Reply)

^^ This
I don't like a lot of the shit that's on the telly, but it's worth it for Radio 4 and newsnight.

*is boring old fart*
(Bazongaloid, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 13:08, Reply)

TV Licence
I don't mind paying, but I should get a rebate for Strictly Come Dancing.
( rofl harris, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 13:11, Reply)

Im not in the UK
Our state broadcaster is riddled with ads.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 13:13, Reply)

As you got the job
you should change your opening post to:

What I learnt today:
Always always make a bestiality joke in a job interview.

Congrats
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Thu 11 Dec 2008, 19:08, Reply)