Alright wankers
Who's going to get upset and wobble a lot today then?


(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 11:50, 59 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Morning cheeseflap
How's it hanging?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 11:54, Reply)

Up your cock
is where it is hanging.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 11:54, Reply)

Eh?
Who the hell are you?
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 11:56, Reply)

Nice try dickwad
no-one is convinced.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 11:57, Reply)

No-one is convinced of what?
I'm so confused! Who are you....?
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 11:58, Reply)

I might have a wobble
if I can't get any Milky Way Stars this lunchtime.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 11:58, Reply)

A welsh friend of mine
used to say 'hanging' when she meant 'minging'.

You're not Welsh are you, Cheeseflap?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 11:59, Reply)

I'm not welsh
and i'm fucking insulted you even suggested such a thing.

Stormtrooper, everyone knows who I am really. And I think you do too. Trouble is, no-one knows who you are.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:00, Reply)

You're not al
the writing style's not there, you're not PJM, he's not capable of being so horrid, you're not Bert, because he has flair and good looks, you're not Kaol because you haven't mentioned stabbing or prostitutes yet.

Are you Davros's Grandad?
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:01, Reply)

Are you getting upset and wobbly
my little Welsh Rarebit?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:02, Reply)

Do bugger off stormtrooper
Or i'll have to reveal your secret identity.

People like you aren't welcome here.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:03, Reply)

Edit: ^^^^^
I have Northern friends who use that term to describe undesirable things too, but they also say "imaget" instead of "and so I said".
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:03, Reply)

I'm scared, cheeses
you're being mean to me. Online.

You're not eloquent enough to be Pooflake... are you baldmonkey? mike woz ere? Are you a /talker?

Give me a clue!

and it's not much of a secret, anybody who reads my profile, or saw my picnic in HSH a few days ago will know who I am
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:05, Reply)

imaginary stormtrooper's identity
isn't much of a secret.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:06, Reply)

You don't happen have any secret insider information
that could burst open the whole of /talk do you? If you did, we might let you in our clique.

But then we'd know your name. For now, I think Cheeseflap will do nicely.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:06, Reply)

You should be scared stormtrooper
You should be very very afraid.

And i'm not wobbling MrOli. The only little wobbler round here would be your mum.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:07, Reply)

What's this?
Has Bert got a new username?

edit - that should be another new username
(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:08, Reply)

Picture
That man has fewer than the standard number of fingers. He should be burned as a witch.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:10, Reply)

al
It's not me, seriously, I have no idea who he is. Two of my accounts are frozen
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:11, Reply)

Yeah, if you'd REALLY done my mum you wouldn't say that
She's so fat, she went to the cinema the other day and sat next to EVERYBODY.

err, no, hang on. Think I'll just come in again.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:11, Reply)

Oh dear
So it's hanging up north, eh?

I suspected as much.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:13, Reply)

The north is the domain
of fatties and thickies. It's well known.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:15, Reply)

@IStormtrooper
Two of your accounts frozen?
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:15, Reply)

What other account got naughtystepped then?
And do fuck off cheeses, there is nowt wrong with the north.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:16, Reply)

^^
Fatties, thickies AND smellies.

That's why they have the saying 'It's grim up north'. Because it's true. Painfully true.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:17, Reply)

It wasn't me.
/shaggy

No seriously, it wasn't.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:17, Reply)

Yeah, what's going on with that?
I saw your thread got deleted yesterday and it all went quiet.

Didn't consider anything in there all that offensive. And the bits that were were all pretty tongue in cheek. Well, I HOPE they were tongue on cheek ;-)

You on the naughty step?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:17, Reply)

Yep, two
Sexmonkey and Jam Mister Geordie.

This one will probably get frozen out too, now that I've announced who I am.

No idea who this cheese person is though. He's alright, but he needs less dickwad, and more cunt.

Oli, yes I am. BIG TIME. The internet hates me.
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:17, Reply)

Excellent
Kittie agrees with me, and she's moving to Manchester.

Looks like Mr thegeordie is having a little wobble of his own.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:18, Reply)

Dickwad is an essentially american insult
I reckon cheese is TRL trying to release his dark side on us all.

STOP IT, TRL, don't be nasty to al
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:18, Reply)

what was the thread that got deleted?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:20, Reply)

I can't say, V
I'll get told off
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:22, Reply)

It was a picture
of Berts face.

But it was so awful he got an automatic naughtystep.

Wrong again monkeyboy.

Has it not occured to you I might just be new?
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:22, Reply)

I'm so confused
But that's probably because I don't know who any of you are in Real Life, so this is none of my business really.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:23, Reply)

You can't possibly be new
You are a sexual meat puppet.

My face really is that offensive, when I was born the doctor slapped my mum.

Kitty, we're all confused, there are bannings, fake accounts and pictures of Hitlercock everywhere
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:24, Reply)

There should be
a lot more hitlercock.

Up MrOli's arse.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:27, Reply)

I want to kiss you
and ejaculate up your rectum, you sexy bitch
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:29, Reply)

Naa, your balls are too big to be new
But not swollen like Bert's were

*sniff* Oh Bert, what did they do to you?
Stormtrooper, it's a wonderful impression of him you do, but it's not the same. IT'S JUST NOT THE SAME *shhhhhhhhhniff* *blubber* *wink*

Also, Bert was a cunt, not a cock. As I said yesterday on a sadly deleted thread, a cunt is a beautiful thing.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:29, Reply)

I'm just going
to ignore all wobbling comments from now on.

They are getting a bit tired.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:29, Reply)

He must be
a /talker, nobody here is this obstinant.

Hi cheesey! I like you, I want to give you oesophagus sexing
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:31, Reply)

What's going on???
And no, I'm not cheeses swept.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:31, Reply)

That sound like a wobbling comment right there althegeordie

Stormtrooper, you couldn't oesophagus sex me if you tried.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:32, Reply)

Oh look
more northerners come to spoil the party.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:32, Reply)

Steady on, dear boy
There's already quite enough up there: You can see hitler bell when I open my mouth too wide.

Have a look *opens mouth*

Closer, closer. See?

*Squirts Cheeseflap in the eye*
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:33, Reply)

Cheese
You're obviously a /talk meat sock, but that's ok.

Continue about your business, like a cunt, but please, make it funny.
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:34, Reply)

Okay
there are two monkeys in a bath and the first one goes

"Ooooo Oo OOO OOOOOO OOO-AH! OOOO-AAAA-AAAAAHHH!!! OOOOOO-AAAAAA-OOOOOO-AAAA-AAAAAHHHHH!!!!!"

And the second monkey goes

"For gods sake dave, if it's too hot just run some cold water in."
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:37, Reply)

Brilliant
You're my new favourite member
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:38, Reply)

Pffft!
I love that joke.

I like to imagine that is what David Cameron and George Osbourne are talking about when you see them walking around on the news and stuff.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:42, Reply)

Excellent
I'm now Berts favourite penis.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:43, Reply)

I love you, favourite penis
can I make a brulee out of your pre-come?
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:49, Reply)

Nice crispy
cum brulee.

With strawberry or passionfruit?

Does anyone know how to do funny accents on e's?
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:58, Reply)

You'd have to, wouldn't you
Tell the prime minister the filthiest joke you can think of on that little walk, try to fake him out for the cameras.

Funniest thing I've ever seen was my friend faking out his brother whilst pulling a bong.

Brother toasted the cone....drawing...drawing...finger off, starts rushing the smoke through...

My friend leans in as the smoke disappears and calmly asks, "Dude, have you ever had a felching session go wrong?"

That was it. Said brother fell off the sofa, unable to breath out, unable to control the giggles.

He was rolling around on the floor holding his knees and giggling for a good ten minutes after.

I think this was compounded by being totally incapable of breathing the intensely fragrant smoke out for a full minute, giving himself the most superb crushing blowback.

Oh, happy days...


/edit: probably only funny if you were there, or can picture a blond 18 stone 6'5" bouncer type giggling like a schoolgirl.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 12:59, Reply)

Cock off..
fuckmuncher
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 13:02, Reply)

come come
Mr Oli isn't that bad.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 13:04, Reply)

No, sorry.
I can do funny accents on helium though.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 13:06, Reply)

I thought you
promised to try to be funny, Cheesebasket?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 13:08, Reply)

é
ctrl-alt-e

dumbass

bah, I want to know what the deleted thread said. I always miss the fun stuff...
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 13:08, Reply)

I thought you promised
your scoutmaster that you would stop touching yourself.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Tue 27 Jan 2009, 13:10, Reply)

He has stopped touching himself
it's just the other boys and the scoutmaster that reap the benefits of his over-active wandering-hand-parkinsons
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Tue 27 Jan 2009, 14:28, Reply)