I got the most disturbing voicemail today
From a number I don't know and a voice I don't recognise. As far as I can tell, the guy who left it was trying to have phone sex with my answer machine.

I can't catch all of it, but amongst other things, there's stuff about how horny he is for me, how he wants to lick my nipples, spurt hot cum into my mouth and something about my...shoulders?

Even stranger, it was left at half nine this morning. I really hope it was a wrong number...
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Sat 28 Mar 2009, 19:28, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Oops.
I... I need to make a call.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 28 Mar 2009, 19:34, Reply)

Aww
You beat me to it chains.

I lost like I would if I raced a fat person to a cake :(
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 28 Mar 2009, 19:35, Reply)

And I even took the time
to check the profile to make sure I wanted to make that joke.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 28 Mar 2009, 19:48, Reply)

Err,
Thanks?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Sat 28 Mar 2009, 19:54, Reply)

You're quite welcome.
Don't mention it.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 28 Mar 2009, 23:56, Reply)

How strange...
You don't have any exes/potential boyfriends whatever who might be drunk at 9:30am do you?
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Sat 28 Mar 2009, 20:43, Reply)

Exes/potential boyfriends that would be drunk on a Friday night, yes.
but I don't know about half nine Saturday morning.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Sat 28 Mar 2009, 20:49, Reply)

I'm pointing the finger at...
Bert or Althegeordie
(tuqueboy has been in a medically -induced coma since, Sat 28 Mar 2009, 21:40, Reply)

*shrug*
Unless there's any other weird shit going on, then I'd just put it down as a wrong number.
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Sat 28 Mar 2009, 22:23, Reply)

...
Mom?
(feedingtimeatthezoo day 1 of his bikini diet started, Sun 29 Mar 2009, 16:56, Reply)