I need to settle an argument
so, good citizens of b3ta:

Who would win in a fight - Batman or Wolverine?
(Holy Gabrielle is Holy, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:45, 50 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I honestly think
that most b3tans have discussed this at length loudly in a pub before.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:46, Reply)

Wolverine
he's indestructible
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:46, Reply)

^
This!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 28 May 2009, 12:47, Reply)

^ This
Get Batman naked, and you're nowhere.

Wolverine heals as soon as you cut him, and his skeleton is MADE OF METAL.

Mutant 1 - Manmade 0

EDIT: Yeah, I know his skeleton technically is manmade, but the healing ain't.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:48, Reply)

How do you intend...
...to get Batman naked?
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 28 May 2009, 12:49, Reply)

Penetrate him
With Wolverine's CLAWS.

I sort of meant, take away the gadgets, and Batman's just an ordinary man innee? Wolverine naked, I'm sure that's been in one of the Xmen films (I'm not a great comic reader, sorry) and he's still been able to kill eveyrhting.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:52, Reply)

Hehe I knew what you meant...
...I was just trying to make a funny... sort of backfired.
sorry
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 28 May 2009, 12:54, Reply)

Yes, I could tell
I tried to be funny back, hence the penetration.

I suck.

*slow clap*
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:58, Reply)

Oh well...
...we both suck! :)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 28 May 2009, 12:59, Reply)

No wonder you two are so popular.

( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:05, Reply)

Sorry.
Maybe it's my habit of replying to things that need no reply.

Or maybe it's cause I'm an unfunny, stupid bint :D
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:06, Reply)

Ha-ha
I meant because you suck.
( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:07, Reply)

Wink wink
.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 28 May 2009, 13:08, Reply)

Hello you :)

( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:11, Reply)

Oh really?
I would NEVER have noticed that I suck.

I'm calling a mod. I'm being BULLIED.





I hope to GOD people realise I'm not being serious.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:08, Reply)

You're funny.

( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:10, Reply)

Thank you.
I take that compliment with a hearty measure of chemical compound that, when considered rare enough and useful for its preservational qualities, was used as pay in the Roman Army.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:12, Reply)

Just watch your blood pressure, is all.

( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:13, Reply)

Wolverine's more than prepared to kill
Batman isn't.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:48, Reply)

Wolverine, Bub.
Batman has teh MAD SKILLZ, but Wolverine is pretty well indestructible.

EDIT: Already been said several times. Argument over, bub. *grows really big sideburns and sellotapes kitchen knives to fingers*
(Slip Digby is a meat puppet, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:49, Reply)

So thats why...
...all the kitchen knives are blunt!!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 28 May 2009, 12:50, Reply)

Of course!
He's been scratching his head.
( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:52, Reply)

Hehehe
.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 28 May 2009, 12:56, Reply)

Batman,
because Wolverine would be helpless with laughter at the sound of BATMAN'S STUPID FUCKING VOICE.
( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:49, Reply)

OH, you and I are goiung to fall out.
Sexually.
(Slip Digby is a meat puppet, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:50, Reply)

No we're not. Of course Wolverine would win.
I am Wolverine to your Batman.
( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:51, Reply)

Well then. That's a gauntlet thrown down, isn't it?
Have at you! :)
(Slip Digby is a meat puppet, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:55, Reply)

*carves Slippy into a new, exciting shape*

( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:57, Reply)

Oooooh!

(Slip Digby is a meat puppet, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:10, Reply)

Unfair fight, one's a superhero, the other is some sort of ....ermm... well, he's not a super hero, he just has cool gadgets.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:51, Reply)

(superhero) mutant
Actually, scratch that, aren't most superheroes mutants if they're not people-with-cool-gadgets?

Or aliens.
Or gods.

Look at the Watchmen, the only technically powered one is Dr Manhattan.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:54, Reply)

*loves Rorschach*

( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:54, Reply)

Rorschach is dead, baby.
EVERYBODY'S DEAD.
(Slip Digby is a meat puppet, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:56, Reply)

My most recent ex
is Nite Owl II. No question about it.

1. Ridiculously fanboi over his heroes
2. Has cool gadgets
3. Dresses as an owl
4. Would be mean to comment on premature ejaculation/erectile dysfunction. But had no experience of it with him. Then again, wasn't really with him long enough.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:57, Reply)

I've never seen it, and I've not read the comic books.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:11, Reply)

See, i agree
Wolverine can't really lose.
Yet all my neighbours are strangely divided over this one...
(Holy Gabrielle is Holy, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:52, Reply)

Time to douse them in petrol, I should think.

( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:53, Reply)

Proffers lighter

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:55, Reply)

*coolly lights cigarette from flames*
*runs off with Becky*
( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:58, Reply)

Gropes Clendrix

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:59, Reply)

*glees*

( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:02, Reply)

Well one of them also believes all gay men are rapists
So this seems like the best possible course of action.
(Holy Gabrielle is Holy, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:21, Reply)

Oh dear...

( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:23, Reply)

Oh yeah
Feel the christian love...
(Holy Gabrielle is Holy, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:28, Reply)

Adamantium
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adamantium

What else do you need to know?
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:18, Reply)

Neither of them.
They'd both fall foul of my cunningly-devised, well-explained trap and die of unimaginable pain and horror!

Muahahahahahahaha!

*rubs hands together*
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 28 May 2009, 12:55, Reply)

Or ...
You could just call the police.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:04, Reply)

Wormulus

( WormuIus, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:00, Reply)

...slices them to death with his razor-sharp wit.
wit parting
( thealternativefact, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:03, Reply)

giggles
it's funny cos it's truuuuuuuuuuuuue
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 28 May 2009, 13:06, Reply)