I'm not a garden gnome!
:(
( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:27, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

Well, you will sit there playing with your rod.

( thealternativefact, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:29, Reply)

Next time I'm at a fancy dress party...

( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:31, Reply)

CHCB has already fucked a gnome hasn't she?
I distinctly remembering reading about it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:32, Reply)

I think you might be right
A threesome with Harry Potter and a garden gnome if I'm not mistaken.
( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:33, Reply)

consider it a fetish

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:34, Reply)

Oh dear
Somebody, anybody, HELP ME!
( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:35, Reply)

*dresses up as harry potter*

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:36, Reply)

That's NOT what I meant!

( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:36, Reply)

it's what you want though
you want it hard
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:38, Reply)

Maybe
Definitely
( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:38, Reply)

but it'll do nicely!

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:38, Reply)

I've made you a smurf outfit.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:36, Reply)

I hope this is true

( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:37, Reply)

*smirks*

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:38, Reply)

Yeah
But it's a Smurfette one.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:40, Reply)

Even better

( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:42, Reply)

So
Will you wear it to the next bash?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:42, Reply)

Shhh
Don't spoil Bill's birthday present for him!
( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:43, Reply)

here ya go:
www.coolest-homemade-costumes.com/smurfette-costume-4.html

You'll probably need to scale it down a bit.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:45, Reply)

So paint myself blue
And get a white dress. I guess I'll need a wig too.
( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:46, Reply)

*glees*
Buy it all in Sainsburys and then see if the checkout lady asks if you have plans for the evening.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:47, Reply)

get some ky too
and some durex extra-safe
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:49, Reply)

This pretty much happened Tuesday night
Cider, condoms and toothbrushes. The checkout woman asked "are you doing much tonight?". Unfortunately CHCB didn't think of saying "Yes, I'm leaving my husband" until we were walking out the door.
( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:51, Reply)

that would've been awesome
puts me in mind of a time when I bumped into a colleague in the supermarket, due to the layout of the place I had in my basket:

1 very large leek
1 box condoms
1 box razor blades
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:53, Reply)

Brilliant
A qotw about supermarkets, or shopping incidents in general, would be much better than the shit we've had lately.
( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:56, Reply)

it certainly would

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 16:06, Reply)

I would have also liked V to have used the line
cider/inside her
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:54, Reply)

Damn
And I won't be there to see it.

:(
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:50, Reply)

I tried,
But my ego's too big for my Gnome-Rescue Hat.
Sorry.
( Cawl, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:36, Reply)

I snogged, dropped and almost broke a real midget IRL.

( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:36, Reply)

Finally
Somebody that appreciates the distinction between me and midgets!
( Captain V, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:39, Reply)

yeah,
another midget can tell you apart. Great.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:41, Reply)

Oi! That's hightist innit!
I'll have you know I can reach the dizzying height of 5'2" after a visit to my chiropractor.
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:45, Reply)

I couldn't remember who the 3rd party was
harry potter was the obvious choice though
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:35, Reply)

it wasn't a real gnome though.
Not like V.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 15:37, Reply)