YOU CALL ME BLACK BASTARD
....then you are white fat fucking cow"

Was the shout, eyes popping out, turban fizzing. The object of his rage, a pasty, queasy looking she-ned who had been marinaded in cheap cider and left to bake under the midday sun, gleefully jumped to the challenge that the goggled eyed 'Spaki' had so charmingly laid down.

She pointed her tasteless face piercing into the prevailing wind, and charged. He on the other hand swiped a be-turbaned kick and she promptly assumed a prostrate position to wit a few kicks to the skull would not have went amiss. It was not to be however, she sprung back up as quickly as here kappa shod legs could muster.

"YOU CALL ME BLACK BASTARD, YOU FUCKING BITCH" - Yes pal, she did, now rise above and go away, she aint worth it. At this point my wife takes out her phone and wields it, weapon like, toward the unfolding shitstorm.

The Asian guy sees this and picks up his rottweiler pup and legs it, they, the she-neds that is, pick up on a new target, my wife. I'm not sure how close she came to being shoed, but, fortutiously, she was not. They huffed, puffed and gesticulated wildly...however, going to get their gaudy baubles and gew-gaws and of course, the small baby in the pram. They decide vacating the park was the best course of action. And so it was over. Bellahouston park, casual racial hatred, assault, threats of violence. All in a days work, and what caused it all? The guys pup went to lick a bottle belonging to the mewling crotch fruit.

True story, it only happened yesterday. Anyone else got any similar heartwarming tales?






"Hows my line breaks? Call 0845 653 9892 if you see anything that contravenes common sense."
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 13:58, 41 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Well told
You cunt.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:00, Reply)

What?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:01, Reply)

what a massive pile of incomprehensible shit

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:05, Reply)

cheers, big ears
thats exactly what i thought i stood watching it all unfold
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:07, Reply)

?
How do you "assume a prostate position" ?
(b3tamax Mate, you're fat and I'll throw you in the river, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:16, Reply)

hands in your arse?

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:18, Reply)

even if you're a woman?
(b3tamax Mate, you're fat and I'll throw you in the river, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:18, Reply)

hands in someone else's arse?

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:21, Reply)

NINJA EDIT

(b3tamax Mate, you're fat and I'll throw you in the river, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:35, Reply)

Cr3 can't do the tiniest little changes without you lot going up in arms,
I particularly liked that flounce that equated the line break changes to racism.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:18, Reply)

Did this really happen?

( Cawl, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:19, Reply)

No pictures yet.

(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:20, Reply)

yes
yesterday at about 7pm. No one was arrested or shoe'd in the head and all parties went safely on their way,
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:22, Reply)

Yep, read /offtopics own white knight Big girls blouses little tantrum below
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post479937
(PsychoChomp, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:22, Reply)

That wasn't anything special.
You got my hopes up.
Then dashed them. Again.
( Cawl, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:25, Reply)

I think it's pretty special,
I would have given her a quick banning for that.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:26, Reply)

But you don't have any sense when people are taking the piss
which is why you keep hanging around here and talking to us.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:28, Reply)

I thought you all loved me :(

(PsychoChomp, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:38, Reply)

we're very fickle

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:50, Reply)

We got bored with you.
NEXT.
( Cawl, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:56, Reply)

FFS !
I was joking.
( girlinthehole, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:28, Reply)

quite obviously joking too
some of the /talkers really like to make a meal out of the most insignificant of things on a part of the site that they claim to not even use.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:32, Reply)

I don't come here enough to even know what you mean

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:32, Reply)

nested replies for one
regardless of what anyone here thought of them, a load of people from /talk seemed to have an opinion on it, when it doesn't affect them one bit.

similarly, the number of alleged lies on qotw. no one should give a shit, and yet a lot of /talkers seem to.

there are probably other things too
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:36, Reply)

I was actually trying to make a joke

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:38, Reply)

I don't understand
what is a joke?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:39, Reply)

YOU ARE RUINING MY BEST DAY EVAH
ONLINE
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:40, Reply)

I know it was a joke,
but it was innapropriate and cr3 gets too much stick as it is considering he gets nothing and gives a whole shitload of his time to making b3ta better.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:39, Reply)

You can't put a price on power.
Also, he gets all the chicks.
( Cawl, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:43, Reply)

Innapropriate?
On B3ta?


You are joking aren't you?


And he's a geek. He fucking loves it.
( girlinthehole, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:43, Reply)

Please think twice before adding line breaks -- your post will be skipped over if it looks too spread out or is a wall of text.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:46, Reply)

Suck

my

big

girly

cock.
( girlinthehole, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:49, Reply)

What happened?
An asian mans dog licked a chavs baby bottle, they had a small fight and your wife got involved?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:27, Reply)

Yes,
that is what it says. However, your summary was lovely, thanks.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:30, Reply)

Well that's not really what it says at all
It's barely readable. The summary was much better.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:33, Reply)

No
What you wrote was incomprehensible gibberish. I made a stab at deciphering it.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:33, Reply)

yes
in retrospect, i preferred the summary as well. my personal remit was to make the text as fractured as the event itself, which i now realise was a big mistake..

buy hey, thanks you guys, you've already fixed my line breaks problem up, now all i need is just a few more bitch slaps regarding content and i will be as right as rain!
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 14:38, Reply)

bellahouston park
not really surprising now is it
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 15:29, Reply)

nope
not really. although you would think its proximity to the high security 'govan polis station' would see them behave a bit better

evidently not
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 15:32, Reply)

ha
govan polis? I've seen better policing in an empty field
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 21:17, Reply)

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 15 Jul 2009, 17:00, Reply)