Yes to both of those.
You will have to forgo the pleasure of my wit and banter for a whole two weeks while I lie in the sun in the south of france and occasionally ride my NEW BIKE!
(Bazongaloid, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:48, 3 replies, latest was 17 years ago)

Try not to ride
your gay bike over the side of a cliff or something.

That would be an awful loss
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:49, Reply)

This is terrible news for b3ta.
As I'm off for the same two weeks.
Although I'm visiting slightly less exotic places.
( Cawl, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:50, Reply)

Your bike sucks
I saw it at least three times at the weekend being ridden in the London bikeathon. It's shit bike.
( Captain V, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:52, Reply)

I don't think you did
It was locked in my shed the whole time.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:53, Reply)

It looked very much like your bike, al.
I think your bike might be cheating on you.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:54, Reply)

Why .....
why would tell me that in an open forum? Why!? I thought we were friends!?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:56, Reply)

It's for the best.
The shock might make you see sense.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:57, Reply)

That's not how restraining orders work
You're not being forced to restrain the bike and spunk on it all the time
( Captain V, Mon 20 Jul 2009, 10:55, Reply)