When nature calls.
I'm writing a handbook for those going walking in the country for the first time. I'm writing about taking on water, and the obvious ensuing expelling of water that will follow. How do you feel about pissing outdoors? Is there an etiquette to observe? Have you ever been caught in the act?

Alternatively, are you into watersports?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 8:13, 18 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I hate having to have a waz outside.
I did manage it when I went to America and I was very proud of myself.
( girlinthehole, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 8:28, Reply)

Pissing outside
is a basic human right, which European law fails to uphold, IMHO.

There are few things quite so satisfying as a pee against a tree on a cold frosty day, as the steam rises and your bladder is relieved.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 8:31, Reply)

Very this
I've not done it in a long time though, which is a shame.
( Captain V, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 8:37, Reply)

Yeah
I love pissing in goldfish ponds. Really annoys the gnomes.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Fri 31 Jul 2009, 10:46, Reply)

I had to get over my inhibitions about this in Mongolia -
there is no tree cover. No anything cover. Fine for the blokes but us girls were initially perturbed. Eleven days of steppe-traversing later and I loved wild pissing. Ahhh, the freedom! The gently, cooling breeze!

Not into watersports though. Not even as a spectator.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 8:49, Reply)

Did you carry a wee shovel
for when you had to do a crap?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 8:54, Reply)

Yes.
And we waited until dark for that. One at a time we'd pick up the shovel and wander into the darkness away from the camp and keep an eye out for marmots.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 9:02, Reply)

Marmots?
Ach, you could always bash them on the head with the shovel.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 9:08, Reply)

Not even a little jetski action?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 8:55, Reply)

Ah! Mongolia.
One thing I did learn there is that it's possible to wear a type of coat that when in the squatting position reaches to the ground. This not only protects your modesty but keeps you warm as well. I never tried it but I'd imagine that being male, I'd have to put a hand inside so I don't piss on the inside of the coat.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 23:28, Reply)

Its the country.
No one cares if you piss on it.

(At least go do it behind a tree, for gods sake.)
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 31 Jul 2009, 9:00, Reply)

I'm sure piss is full of something useful
Nitrates or something. Good for the soil.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 9:31, Reply)

Although
Mine is typically about 10% proof, I'm not sure if that would have an adverse effect.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 9:37, Reply)

You must be from a town or city
I spend a lot of time in the country, and I think I probably have a good piss most of the times I am out.

I think ettiqute demands not doing it on the footpath directly, and not in to the wind either.

Now, having a dump is another matter. Best to find a nice woodland and a decent size log (no pun intended) to dangle over.

Got caught once, in Germany, by a hunter up one of those little towers. I made the error of looking around and forgetting to look up. He was about to have a go at me when I said all nonchalantly "Mornin". Now he knew I was English, he gave up and probably thought it was normal in this country. I should have said "Bon jour".
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 9:50, Reply)

my experience of europeans
is that they'll piss anywhere with no shame.

I was at Roskilde festival trudging along the path betwixt camping and arena and some hairy euro-bint drops trou and unleashes a steaming yellow torrent. filth.

my dad has had to shoe frenchies away from his car in a carpark where the (and I use the term loosely) lady had squatted down adjacent to his wheel.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 10:27, Reply)

So your dad isn't the golden showers/dogging type?
What about your mum?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 10:34, Reply)

I had a shit while swimming in a lake once
I've written about it here before.

It was quite fun. Especially watching it tumble gently through the water to the lake bed.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 11:08, Reply)

This
is where I will be living for the next week



And this is the view I will be weeing to.



There's nothing quite as liberating as walking around nekid in the great outdoors. Except perhaps weeing in it...
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 18:47, Reply)