Ok, so it's Monday. Great.
No matter how much you hate your job, there must be some little perk that you get amusement from.

I've arranged a fire-drill for 10:00, purely because people will have just settled back into their work from the weekend, when BAM, earful of alarm and eyefuls of bright, burning sunlight.

So, what perverse sources of joy do you get from your job?
( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 9:48, 37 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I'm seeing how long I can spend doing general admin and filing
before my boss phones me and actually gives me some work. He's just got back from holiday so I'm guessing it will take him a while to get settled in and notice that I've not got anything to do.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 9:52, Reply)

I'm in charge of the air conditioning
if people annoy me they get frozen, or boiled.

or if they whinge at me about the temperature then I go prod the control panel, change nothing, and then a little while later they come and say "thanks, that's much better"

morons.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 9:54, Reply)

I like this.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 9:58, Reply)

Nothing
I hate my job and all who sail in her.

Although I do get a perverse sense of pleasure by having my first crap of the day at work and using thier toilet paper. I wonder what a psychologist would make of that?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 9:55, Reply)

My perk is I work in and IT department in a University
Its summer holidays so It quite relaxed around here at the moment.
( Peej, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 9:58, Reply)

Also, for part of my work, I get to wander around occupied hotel rooms.
Interesting stuff you see.
( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 9:58, Reply)

why do you do that?
and what sort of things?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 9:59, Reply)

To measure up rooms for new furniture.
I'm not allowed in rooms that the people are physically IN, but if they're not there, in I go.
I've seen a bed that had been shit all over, with a brown hand-print on the wall, above the headboard.
There was another room that had a single female occupant who had more sex toys than an Ann Summers warehouse.

I feel kinda intrusive when I go in, just do my job and leave fast.
( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:06, Reply)

interesting stuff

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:13, Reply)

You'd've been better off not replying at all.

( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:14, Reply)

true
I did find it interesting though, just couldn't think of anything else to say about it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:18, Reply)

*yawns*
To keep on track with the boring-ness, my fire drill took 2 min 13 sec.
( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:19, Reply)

Is that good
or is that hideously dead by fire?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:23, Reply)

We're allowed to take up to 5 minutes.
So, yeah, we're good.
( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:26, Reply)

you need to set more traps next time

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:27, Reply)

i do a fair bit of hotel maintenance work (mainly Plumbing), generally occupied but empty rooms...
and i can attest to that!
normally just bags and stuff, deoderant, novel,
but it's the "surprize" items we point-out to each other, sniggering...in one day, different rooms...
big (BIG) tub of lube,
gimp mask,
cat o'nine-tails,
nazi officer's hat & gloves,
15kg tray of top-notch asparagus,
loads of porn,
a stuffed badger
and gramme of speed we found on the floor in a corridor.
it were good speed.
;-)
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:25, Reply)

15kg is a lot of asparagus

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:27, Reply)

15kg of asparagus?
Wow!
Was that in the same room as the lube?
( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:28, Reply)

it was just a normal cardboard veg-tray from a wholesale market, like you see on the racks in tesco.
but sadly it was not in the room with lube, that was the badger.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:30, Reply)

Pffft!
It's odd going into hotel rooms though.
And women are ALWAYS messier than men. FACT.
( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:33, Reply)

this is something that was noted at university as well
they'll try and deny it, but it is solid fact.

they might clean more often (might not) but they are definitely messier
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:34, Reply)

Haha!
I learned the word "floordrobe" from an ex. So messy. *tuts and shakes head*
( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:36, Reply)

floordrobe! likes.
funny.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:38, Reply)

Don't make me lock you in the floordrobe again Kaol

( Captain V, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:39, Reply)

I hope you're savouring your last few days with your right ear.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:40, Reply)

:(

( Captain V, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:42, Reply)

You missed out on two different lots of exciting fun.

( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:42, Reply)

what is happening to his ear?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:42, Reply)

He lost the right to have a right ear
when he decided not to come out on saturday and instead spent the day cottaging in Brighton.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:47, Reply)

makes perfect sense to me

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:53, Reply)

but men's rooms ALWAYS smell worse.
we know this to be true.
i've had days where i've been in 200 rooms, surveying, and you can tell when a guy's been staying in the same room for a couple of nights as soon as you open the door. man-smell.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:37, Reply)

Exactly right.
You can tell, as soon as you open a door if a man, a woman or nobody slept in the room the night before. Just by the smell, I mean.
( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:39, Reply)

can you tell if a bear has slept in it?
or a thieving, trespassing young blonde girl?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:42, Reply)

and also by the texture of the imprint in the matress...
or so i'm told.
but actually i rather enjoy going in and out of folkses rooms.
rule is obviously never touch anything, unless it's in the way of doing the job.
and i'm a bit of a voyeur.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:43, Reply)

Yeah, never touch!
I have to take photos of odd room shapes or support beams, which is always fun when it looks like an Oxfam clothes bin has been nail-bombed.
( Cawl, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:45, Reply)

i've taken a few sneaky pics, nowt too dodgy.
mainly just total filth or nice knickers laid-out on the bed...
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 17 Aug 2009, 10:53, Reply)

(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 12:21, Reply)