Hey there Fatties. I was just discussing this latest terrible attack on /talk by your fuller selves over at the better internet page.
So I thought I best come sort this silly little charade out before it gets out of hand and ultimately a small island on here blames me.
I think the best way to see this through is by having one of your more popular liars say "Sorry" to me, and I shall forward it to the silver-backs on /talk.

Please.
Feel free to go right ahead.
More apologies the better.

No fat birds.


I feel I should point out that they're all making fun of YOU, and I'm not joining in.
You people should also say thank you to me. As whilst on one hand I'm incredibly popular and generally in charge around here, I do not join in with everyone else who makes fun of you.
Please don't come in if you can't handle this. I've no time for QFTW's sympathy seeking types.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:15, 33 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

For God's sake ONE of you must be considered "Popular" on here?
It can't all be shame and blame JMG.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:21, Reply)

Unless all the popular users are fat birds?
I think this would be the final nail.
:(
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:22, Reply)

Awwwww
Sympathy reply right here.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:24, Reply)

It hasn't been ten minutes.
Calm down.

At least you're first to reply to JMG. Your favourite thing to do on here.
*Thumbs up*
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:25, Reply)

It hasn't been ten minutes
and yet you had to reply to your own post. It's okay JMG, sometime I post things and only one or two people respond. It's not a measure of how much your mummy loves you. I promise.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:26, Reply)

I rarely post and only one or two people respond, see?
Different worlds, us two.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:31, Reply)

What's your view on the Mike Ashley saga JMG?
Lardy businessman with not a clue about running a football club, or Mackem in disguise?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:34, Reply)

Portly money grabber.
Out of his depth.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:35, Reply)

It really hasn't boosted my views on fat people with power.
I can tell you.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:35, Reply)

I'm sure.
Steve Bruce: doing a good job down the road or fucking traitor how dare a black and white manage The Enemy?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:39, Reply)

He hasn't been a NUFC man since the 90's.
He sat in the studio with a face like a smacked arse when we beat Man Utd 5-0.
He only ever mentioned us in glowing terms when he wanted more money out of the directors at Wigan or Birmingham.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:43, Reply)

A rational, measured response there.
Chris Hughton: Doing a good job with limited resources, or just really bloody lucky since he could barely manage to tie his own shoelaces last season?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:52, Reply)

A stand in.
But good team spirit.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:55, Reply)

Half time pint
or half time pie?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:57, Reply)

Neither.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:58, Reply)

You disappoint me.
Are you really a Geordie?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 17:07, Reply)

Yes.
Very much so. Man pet.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 17:10, Reply)

Wrong answer.
The correct response should have been "Did ye spill my pint? Ootside, noo".
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 17:14, Reply)

Ahoy Newcastle.
Busy doing manly work here JMG, no time for b3ta today.
( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:26, Reply)

Are you sure you haven't been having lots of great sex?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:27, Reply)

Ha ha. I knew that would provoke a reation over here.
Truth? They can't handle the truth.
( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:28, Reply)

Most of us don't even know what the truth is
we're too wrapped up in our little fantasy worlds. Your life sounds fun too though, were the replies correct in the comments that you and mrs hood-butter got back together then?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:30, Reply)

Calm down.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:29, Reply)

You
should totally sue these guys for stealing your name.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:31, Reply)

Stop taking the internet too seriously.
I'm not a registered trademark.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:32, Reply)

That's a shame
I think a range of JMG crockery would be a top seller. Especially around christmas. You could have your favourite JMG's fault pictures printed on plates so that when the big fatties finish scarfing down their pies they are confronted with the reason they sit alone at night and cry.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:35, Reply)

I'm really very sorry
That you're such a one-trick pony.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:27, Reply)

Which trick?

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:29, Reply)

The one where you pull a rabbit out of your arse.

( Captn Hood-Butter is not dead yet., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:31, Reply)

That's my favourite one.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:32, Reply)

The vibrating kind.

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:32, Reply)

IT'S A GOOD JOB YOU ANSWERED FOR THEM, AND THAT I AM ON BLOCK IN THE HEBRIDES.

( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 19 Oct 2009, 16:33, Reply)

That's just the start
By the year 2013 LIFE will have you on block. You'll be forced to live in a 43rd floor flat, watching repeats of EastEnders and living off Tesco Value Beans delivered by a dwarf with leprosy.
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Mon 19 Oct 2009, 17:11, Reply)