I'm going back to Newcastle
And I'm going to sort my life out. I mean it this time. I've been in a horribly dark place and I'm not going to let it consume me any more. I won't let it.

I'm going to miss a certain someone a ridiculous amount, she's my closest friend and I sometimes feel I can't function without seeing her all the time. It's going to be ridiculously hard to not see her for a few months. I can't put into words how much I need her. I shall persevere, but I don't know how. At all.

So yeah, although as I type I'm in a right state, there's something inside me that's pleased that I'm going to try and sort this out.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 23 Jan 2010, 15:02, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

:)
When are you going?
*aunty Roota hat*
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 23 Jan 2010, 15:06, Reply)

When I can be arsed
I reckon I'll leave here around five. I need to pick some stuff up from a shop by Victoria so I'll do that on the way. And then get a train from Kings Cross around six. My mate's jumping on said train at York and coming out with us around town tonight. I really need that.

I only hope I'll have stopped crying on the train by the time he gets on. I don't know why I will but I know I will. I'm a mess. I really don't know how I'll cope without her you know. Although as of this morning my old dear has banned me from playing The Smiths which has helped.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 23 Jan 2010, 15:22, Reply)

I'm proud of you, kid!
You'll be fine. About 20 mins before he gets on, go and splash your face and listen to some tunes to get you in the mood for a night out.
Keep busy.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 23 Jan 2010, 15:29, Reply)

if it's difficult
it's probably worth doing

this, too, will pass
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 23 Jan 2010, 15:32, Reply)

Good for you, Barry!
After being in severe depressive moods the last year or so, I made a point a couple of weeks ago of trying to sort myself out. I'm now in counselling, and taking care of myself. It's not always easy, but fuck, just cleaning my apartment gives me a sense of achievement these days! You can do it!
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Sat 23 Jan 2010, 15:21, Reply)

Thanks
I'm joining the university gym as of tomorrow. I'm going to step up my every other day routine to twice a day. I in no way can be construed as fat but I'd love to get back to my fighting weight. It will do me the world of good. I think setting goals like that will help.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 23 Jan 2010, 15:26, Reply)

Some of my goals:
Take a shower every day
Wear makeup every day
Eat every day
Clean the apartment weekly and tidy up as I go along
Leave the apartment at least once a day
Sleep in bed instead of on the couch.

Stupid shit like that. And you know what? It's working.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Sat 23 Jan 2010, 15:34, Reply)

Good luck and hope it works out in the end.
In the meantime, try taking up a new activity. This should give your mind something to occupy it.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Sat 23 Jan 2010, 15:39, Reply)