This sounds ghastly.
From a message on our work intranet:

Do you know someone who is… absolutely gorgeous but a real handful?
the makers of big brother are looking for beautiful people to take part in the development of a new tv project that takes a fun look at good-looking, demanding, high-maintenance characters and the lifestyles they lead.
• do you get everything you want, when you want it?
are you the most high-maintenance person you know?
• do you have a gorgeous girlfriend / boyfriend – but sometimes they’re just too much to handle!
• do you know someone with a fiery personality who just needs to chill out and enjoy life?
are you beautiful but trouble?
if this sounds like you or someone you know then get in touch:
email: (omitted as I don't want to appear to be spamming)
please email us asap with your name, mobile number and email and tell us why you / the person you’d like to nominate would be great for our project.
****please remember to email photographs!****

I think I'd rather spoon my own eyes out than have to sit and watch a bunch of annoying, vacuous tossers offering themselves up to a baying public. Unless they were going to be locked in a roomfull of tigers without any chairs with which to defend themselves.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 25 Jan 2010, 16:48, 55 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

DG
Gaz me the address, sounds right up my street.
( djtrialprice, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 16:50, Reply)

(!)

( djtrialprice, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 16:50, Reply)

tell us how you really feel

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 16:51, Reply)

Right now?
Hot and sweaty. Bloody office heating system.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 25 Jan 2010, 16:54, Reply)

This might as well say;
"Are you a massive twat? If so send your application to 'Massive Twat Productions' for a chance to be a massive twat on television"
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 16:54, Reply)

this
why don't they do more nice people on Tv things?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:00, Reply)

The bovine tv audience dont want to watch nice people doing nice things
so massive twats it is
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:06, Reply)

interesting would be good
but too much to ask for
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:08, Reply)

We could nominate snugglesacks.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:01, Reply)

You should totally email them.
Do you want the address?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:02, Reply)

Nah, I have no idea what her real details are.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:31, Reply)

do it!

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:08, Reply)

well thanks for bringing it to our attention so we can all think about it and talk about it.

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:11, Reply)

you just over here busting chops today?
or has the /links incident that apparently occurred over the weekend made /talk think that we're not that bad after all?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:12, Reply)

what?
sorry if i've annoyed you somehow!
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:13, Reply)

I would also like to say 'what?'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:14, Reply)

let's all say what?

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:14, Reply)

what?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:15, Reply)

what?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:16, Reply)

What?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:17, Reply)

It's like an episode of Jeeves and Wooster in here

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:17, Reply)

pip pip!

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:19, Reply)

What ho.
Such fun.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:21, Reply)

I should bally well think so

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:23, Reply)

Do you want to nominate your ex, Monty, old boy?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:21, Reply)

Is there execution involved?
If so, yes please, my dear fellow.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:23, Reply)

I would happily give you the email address if you like.
Can't vouch for the execution bit though. Endemol, desperate as they are for viewing figures, haven't quite stooped that low. Yet.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:24, Reply)

They should have a programme called 'Celebrity Suicide'
with 'at-risk' people such as Paul Gascoigne or that Katona being, and rebrand themselves at 'Enditall'.

Heaux, and again I say, heaux.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:26, Reply)

no, not at all
I enjoy your work. just curious as to why you are over here.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:15, Reply)

what?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:17, Reply)

i assumed this was still b3ta...
am i in the wrong place?
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:19, Reply)

it is
I'm sure you know what I mean though
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:19, Reply)

I understand that you have some sort of weird territorial thing going on, i think that is what you are trying to get across?

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:22, Reply)

there is generally acknowledged to be one
it doesn't particularly concern me, but yes, you are right.

now I'm going home via the supermarket. this was not something you needed to know.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:24, Reply)

But it's a nicer response than pissing up his leg.
At least you're improving.
( thealternativefact, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:25, Reply)

Good evening Clendrix.
Do you know what this /links thing is that Vippers aludes to above?

Also, I am getting rather desperate for chops.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:28, Reply)

Hello Monters.
I do not! I was not b3taring at the weekend, but I would like to know if there has been fuss in my absence.

CHOPS! Are we going to fix a date soon?
( thealternativefact, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:30, Reply)

The time is right!
Mr.thegeordie is the one with the hectic schedule. Being an old fucker I have less in my diary - so I suggest we ask him to name a proposed date. Sound acceptable?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:32, Reply)

This sounds perfectly acceptable to me.
I am also rather busy, but friends can be abandoned in the name of MEAT. Will you gaz him?

I assume there was something on /talk at around the same time.
( thealternativefact, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:35, Reply)

IT IS DONE
if you're busy on the proposed date, whatever that may be, then we shall have to re-think.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:38, Reply)

Let's see what he says.
See my edit^
( thealternativefact, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:40, Reply)

How terribly ghey,
they all started crying because a Chris Morris link was posted ten times?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:49, Reply)

you seem to be the only one to whom this is a concern!
you are the one bringing it up see?
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:27, Reply)

Not so.
We routinely have that JMG fellow over here, wittering on about this very topic. The first 30-40 times were quite funny.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:30, Reply)

ok so him and jmg.

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:33, Reply)

The very idea is preposterous isn't it?
Rather school playground, eh.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:41, Reply)

yah yah.
what what.
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:42, Reply)

Vipros is from the countryside.
He has a piece of straw sticking out of the side of his mouth his keyboard.
( thealternativefact, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:44, Reply)

his keyboard his arse.

I also like to think his beard smells of turnips.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:48, Reply)

I do live in a city you know
and was not bred in Devon
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 18:49, Reply)

Fucking endemol!
They'll be first against the wall come the revolution.
(bill, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 17:29, Reply)

I would like the email address associated with this

( WHARRGARBL, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 18:02, Reply)

Really?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 25 Jan 2010, 18:23, Reply)

Really.

( WHARRGARBL, Mon 25 Jan 2010, 18:32, Reply)

Well, I'm not at work just now
But will try to remember tomorrow.

Your profile page doesn't seem to allow me to gaz you though.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 25 Jan 2010, 20:01, Reply)