I'm waiting for an NHS breakfast,
described in the bedside folder as "continental style: tea, toast and cereal". Those continentals, eh?
Haven't eaten since lunchtime yesterday, was sick as a dog after my pethidine injection, and boked up my tramadol. Will never complain about needing to pee again.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 8:50, 3 replies, latest was 17 years ago)

Get well soon you.
Do you know when you'll be back on your feet? Also, what no croissants?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 8:52, Reply)

Ta.
Not sure what their plans are but as long as the pain relief keeps coming, I'm happy to be here. Also, every time they do my obs they check the baby's heartbeat and it's so cool hearing the pumpy fast underwater sounds.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 8:56, Reply)

Ooh mind that forrin breakfast doesn't assault your delicate system...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 8:55, Reply)

continentals don't eat cereal
it's an evil american invention and it baffles continentals
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:25, Reply)

It's fucking shit.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:32, Reply)

I like rice crispies

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:35, Reply)

rice crispies are fucking awful
especially after going soggy

almost as bad as sugar puffs

bleurgh
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:36, Reply)

Sugar puffs smell of wee

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:37, Reply)

You just can't stop thinking about wee can you?
*winks*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:43, Reply)

Neither can you
Lying around on your plastic sheeting, pouring warm Skol over youself, pretending it's Robert Plant's piss.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:47, Reply)

Hahaha

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:50, Reply)

A friend of a friend (a nice-looking young woman)
interviewed Robert Plant once. He got his cock out and said 'go on, touch the fucker'. She was appalled and didn't, and left in a hurry.

True story.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:56, Reply)

Robert Plant me
He I
his my
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:58, Reply)

This must have been before he became a nice old man

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:58, Reply)

be
a nice old man

+ all over my eyes when I asked him to 'cause I'm well filthy like that.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:01, Reply)

feck off

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:06, Reply)

It was about 3 years ago

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:01, Reply)

My friend said he was sweet and helpful :(

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:06, Reply)

My friend I

he was sweet and helpful :( come in my eyes you dirty fucker.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:08, Reply)

he might be a perve
but the Robert Plant and the Strange Sensation gig I went to was the best, and probably will remain the best, gig I've ever been to. The man is amazing.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:12, Reply)

He's great, no question.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:21, Reply)

about 3 years ago

+ after I'd shoved my throbbing member down your throat and you kept on taking it out and smacking it against your cheeks and yelling "Come in my eyes you cunt"
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:07, Reply)

I've just decided
Al is going to ghost-write my autobiography.
I trust him.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:11, Reply)

Yeah you do
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:13, Reply)

There wasn't any rice krispies, more's the pity.
There was non-Kelloggs generic cornflakes or bran flakes, a wee plastic carton of concentrated orange juice, and cold toast.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:51, Reply)

Oh sad faces
I hope I never get ill enough to require hospital treatment. I hope it's either rude health or death. There's no way I'm eating bran flakes.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:57, Reply)

it is

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:35, Reply)

Kellog was a mental case
By buying his products you are effectively encouraging mental people's weird obsessions. IS THAT SOMETHING YOU'RE HAPPY DOING.

WELL IS IT?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:38, Reply)

We talk to you don't we?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:40, Reply)

Only to tell me to shut up.
That doesn't count.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:42, Reply)

shut up

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:43, Reply)

That didn't count

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:44, Reply)

PRECISELY.
By the way our booking has been confirmed for the 25th. 7pm, I told them 8 people.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:46, Reply)

Oh sweet.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:47, Reply)

fine!
see if I care

*flounces*
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:50, Reply)

Come up and join us you rapacious bender.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:56, Reply)

He's too busy breaking hobs and abusing children

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:58, Reply)

nicely put
don't have the cash at the moment I'm afraid. can't do midweek either, and have a load of gigs at weekends at the end of february.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:03, Reply)

...and my dog ate my homework, sir.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:05, Reply)

there is that too

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 10:12, Reply)

have you seen the film Road To Wellville?
about Kellogg being a nutter and having some weird health farm.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:43, Reply)

No
I don't believe you have either, you just read the synopsis on IMDB
(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:43, Reply)

then how would I know about the electric nipple clamps and the "therapist" who cures women of things with internal massage

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:46, Reply)

You just made it up

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:47, Reply)

I made up the whole film
all the stuff on imdb is stuff that I put on there a few minutes ago to corroborate my lies.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:50, Reply)

*buys*

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:48, Reply)

I've not no.
Life's too short to watch films about cornflake manufacturers, if you ask me.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:44, Reply)

it's a fictional thing you fucking spastic

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:45, Reply)

So's your face

(Bazongaloid, Wed 10 Feb 2010, 9:47, Reply)