One of those "just fucking google it" threads (I have, by the way)
I slag you losers off for asking technical questions on here but now I have a DIY question and some of you less cack-handed types have nice kitchens, so here goes.

I want to put a cooker hood/extractor fan in the chimney breast. There isn't much room due to the shape of the flue once it reaches 2m. Anyone done this/got one of these? What type of cooker hood should I be looking for? They seem to come in various unfathomable forms.

Alternatively, if a supervolcano was to cause a nuclear winter, what are your emergency plans?
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:13, 25 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I like breasts.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:15, Reply)

I like them alot

(PsychoChomp, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:17, Reply)

hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html
(PsychoChomp, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:21, Reply)

that is really good

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:23, Reply)

I never would have pegged you as reading Hyperbole
I would have thought you would consider it the inane ramblings of a crazy woman...
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:54, Reply)

he replies to you doesn't he?

(wiggy5 3 goats and a midget, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 11:10, Reply)

bitch

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 11:11, Reply)

wiggy5
Can I just point out that you got post696969? You disgusting pervert!
( djtrialprice, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 11:39, Reply)

the extractor is the only bit of kitchen stuff I haven't looked at yet unfortunately
so can't help you

emergency plans mainly involve looting. or, if I happen to be stealing instruments: luting.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:15, Reply)

I was expecting you or al to know the answer to this
*SADFACE*
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:17, Reply)

sorry
my kitchen hasn't happened yet and as we are going for no overhead cupboards I can make the extractor decision quite late on in the process.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:19, Reply)

I have a cellar and nearby Morrisons I can raid for provisions.

( girlinthehole, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:16, Reply)

Loot oddbins
Sit back and wait for death.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:26, Reply)

Check out the unducted ones.
I got one that used pretty heavy duty filters that recirculates the air after scrubbing it. Still going strong after about 15 years. I do replace\clean the filters frequently though.

Something like this one. www.thebigkitchencentre.com/baumatic-std62ss-60cm-standard-hood-1034-p.asp

Obviously you would need one to match your kitchen and width of cooker etc. Quite a few now have re-circulation mode so you could possibly get a hooded one but use it in re-circulation mode. Hope this helps.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:40, Reply)

Cool, thanks, though ducting out the side should be okay.
A few phone calls later and the helpful Elica sales person tells me I should be looking for a built-in cooker hood. That narrows the field a little at least...
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:47, Reply)

shit
I only have plans for zombie attacks
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:44, Reply)

Are you planning to duct the air upwards into the flue?
I'm having trouble visualising what you want to do.
How high up is your exit vent (relative to the intake? Is it a periscope shape?
Would square/rectangular section duct fit?
What I read is that you want to place the extractor fan in the chimney space. If that is the case where is the intake?
It is inevitable that a bespoke solution will cost more than the basic B&Q screw it above the hob job.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:47, Reply)

Okay, I'll do some mangled descriptions, bear with me...
I want to set the cooker hood up into the chimney (with building reg gap of 750mm between gas hob and hood). The ducting will then go out to the right (through the side wall of the chimney breast and out the external wall on the right). So, it'd be a kind of up-and-then-across shape (very technical, I know).

I'm thinking I need to find a built-in hood that will fit the space plus a ducting kit.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 10:50, Reply)

Doesn't sound too complicated. Obviously the chimney isn't used for a fire.
There are quite a few hood + ducting kits available. I was just looking in the Elica catalogue for just such.
If your'e prepared to knock the holes in the flue it should be easy enough. You might find it easiest to core the wall first: that could go wrong if the chimney is built up inside at just that spot! Be prepared to knock out some bricks on the face of the chimney breast.
Assuming at least a 5" duct, you might find it helpful to use a rigid drainpipe pushed through the space to support the ducting. Or even groundwater piping.
Edit Just re-read what you had explained. You're only going out one side of the chimney! Really does sound very staightforward. Or does flexible ducting not shape up to the job? I'd imagine once you have knocked a few bricks out of the side of the flue it will look a lot simpler.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Thu 15 Apr 2010, 11:09, Reply)

Sounds very promising. Especially since I don't have to do the building work myself.
I'm just sourcing the stuff.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 11:26, Reply)

I'd FUCKING GOOGLE what to do in case of nuclear winter.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 11:02, Reply)

No, you'd post on here saying "OMG what's the best way to get food for my starving family?"

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 11:04, Reply)

I'd kill 'em and grill 'em
if only I could work out which type of cooker hood to get.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 11:08, Reply)

Elica Elibloc9 80 seems to be the one.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 11:25, Reply)

*takes notes*

*throws notes away*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 15 Apr 2010, 11:32, Reply)