ME
One of the best /talk threads ever was an impression thread.
Where everyone did impressions of another user.

Seeing as you're desperate to be as good as /talk lets give it a go.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 11:50, 48 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I'll start
"what ho jolly goood, massive drugs, massive drugs I really think you'll want to hear my opinions on your music taste old bean"
(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 11:51, Reply)

Today I saw a really pretty paperclip.
But it was with a bulldog clip and was too pretty to even look at me.
When will I find that perfect girl?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 11:52, Reply)

"Oh I'm all sweet and innocent, when I'm not getting hammered and raping men"

(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 11:57, Reply)

I KNEW IT

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 18 May 2010, 11:58, Reply)

Is that me or Applebite?
I don't think I'm sweet and innocent...
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 11:59, Reply)

That was you, you man eater.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:00, Reply)

I've not had a man for a while.
Not since...March? Maybe?

I don't get any action. I'm not a fucking maneater.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:01, Reply)

Now I have that song in my head
Cheers you two.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:03, Reply)

EVERYBODY LOOK AT ME BEAK BEAK

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:04, Reply)

haha

(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:05, Reply)

I'm a mad beaker make you ignore
make your head sore push your thread right down the board
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:07, Reply)

You're either mocking me or Nelly Furtado
If it's me I'm sad, and demand attention to make it better.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:08, Reply)

you either want to be me or me me me

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:09, Reply)

Still don't get it

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:10, Reply)

I'm just rewriting the words to Maneater to be about beakers.
Just ignore me :D
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:10, Reply)

Why beakers?
The Muppets character? A misspelled 'Beekers' which some of us call Boss Keloid? Childish cups?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:12, Reply)

"Beaking" is drawing attention to oneself.
The Muppet says "ME ME ME ME ME", hence someone who is "ME ME ME ME" is a beaker.

Usually preceded with "fucking"
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:14, Reply)

Thank you for educating me!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:20, Reply)

Milton Keynes is not as grim as everyone thinks it is
but it's still pretty grim so I'm going to pretend I think it's brilliant and that'll make me look like I'm an individual rather than a lifeless office drone and oh hello is that a pretty girl well hello my dear what a smashing blouse...
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 18 May 2010, 11:58, Reply)

HA
that's better than mine
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 11:58, Reply)

I don't think I've ever said smashing blouse.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:03, Reply)

I like this.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:22, Reply)

"I don't approve of this thread because I can't think of anything funny
so I'm going to start one above it, people will definatly enjoy my thread more, I'm thaaat interesting"
(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 11:58, Reply)

I've just done this above this very thread. It was accidental though, This thread wasn't here when I started typing, honest.

(Cave Duck, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:20, Reply)

With five minutes between posts, do you type with one of those head-dobber jobs?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:33, Reply)

"WAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah"

(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:02, Reply)

that's a good one

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:03, Reply)

Who's that?

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:03, Reply)

bgb, batshit, a few others.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:05, Reply)

You could have put more effort into it.

( girlinthehole, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:28, Reply)

this is just a thread so you can slate everyone else
but you will only get upset when everyone decides to impersonate you.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:22, Reply)

I'm not that bothered,
I thought wellgroomedwookiee's one was very funny.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:25, Reply)

True,
but you're only not bothered because you've never said smashing blouse, which means you can try and convince yourself that the rest of it isn't true either.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:30, Reply)

What is wrong with you today?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:37, Reply)

I'm quite happy today
yesterday I was in a horrible mood.

I'm just joshing you! *elbows repeatedly in ribs*
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:43, Reply)

I'm glad you appreciate it,
seeing as I'll be reposting in on Friday when you do this thread again.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:42, Reply)

"You drink too much"
*few days pass*
"I'm an alcoholic"
*few days pass*
"I've given up drink, never again"
*few days pass*
"I've only had a couple this week, I'm very proud of myself"
(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:04, Reply)

There is only one thing in the world worse then being /talked about
And that's not being /talked about.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:07, Reply)

I'm really standoffish, doesn't that make me cool?
Although I'm actually just really really desperate to touch a girl. Any girl. Please?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:24, Reply)

Scathing
Who is it?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:25, Reply)

Chompy?

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:26, Reply)

Definatly.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:26, Reply)

I should have misspelled definitely somewhere
everyone would have got it immediately.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:29, Reply)

You're just annoyed I haven't done an impression of you.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:32, Reply)

I'm inoffensive though
so it would probably consist of "I do slutty dancing whilst pretending that it empowers me, that'll show men!" or something like that.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:44, Reply)

Aw, I thought that was me.
Then I remembered that we haven't met.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:43, Reply)

You'll never get this one
'I like breasts'
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:33, Reply)

That could be anyone here
but probably broadsword.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 18 May 2010, 12:35, Reply)