HAHAHA
Cheryl Cole has Malaria. Surely she should have been taking some nice drugs to prevent this?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:03, 26 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

She did, the didn't work.
I just crushed your thread. Hahahahaha
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:05, Reply)

Well FUCK YOU BECKY
I HOPE YOU CAN NEVER FIND A PAPER CLIP WHEN YOU NEED ONE AND EVERY TIME YOU PICK UP A STAPLER IT JAMS AND WHEN YOU PULL THE BROKEN STAPLE OUT IF STICKS IN THE END OF YOUR THUMB AND IS REALLY SORE FOR ABOUT AN HOUR!
(Bazongaloid, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:13, Reply)

Shit, the paperclips are going to round on me and rape me aren't they?

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:15, Reply)

Psychochomp could easily resolve
any paperclip emergencies
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:15, Reply)

did she?
where did you read that? I'd be interested to know what she was taking, as most the prophylactics seem to work fine when taken correctly. (am not suggesting you lied or anything, but do have slight curiosity about anything parasitological!)
( ascorbate, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:19, Reply)

It's Cheryl Cole.
She heard she needed prophylactics so she swallowed a condom.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:21, Reply)

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/people/news/cheryl-cole-in-hospital-being-treated-for-malaria-2019469.html
I no lie, papers lie ,)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:23, Reply)

oh well
it gives no details. bloody media, don't they realise how nosy the general public are? can't they give us more information on the medical needs of our fave slebs?
( ascorbate, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:39, Reply)

Most of the general public wouldn't know that much about Malaria though.
I saw an interesting parasite last week. Trying to remember the name of it. I found it sludging out of a cats bum. We usually only see ticks and mites and boring stuff like that.
Edit: dipylidium canium
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:44, Reply)

you tell minging stories.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:52, Reply)

Is that your subtle way of saying shut up?
SHANT

Oh man, you shoulda seen it, it was the size of your fingernail, the width of a pen tip, white and WIGGLY. The way you kill them without using antiwormers is to crush them and then they go splat or use of fire.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:54, Reply)

Can't you just put them in the bin?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:55, Reply)

Nope, they might crawl out and into the bumhole of something else.

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:00, Reply)

Man your bins are cack
Nothing gets out of my bin. Apart from smells that shouldn't even be in there.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:01, Reply)

They'd probably breed and mutate off all the other undesirable stuff that goes in there as well.
SUPERPARASITE HO!
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:05, Reply)

i can't believe you have actively tried to prevent this
Until now...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:06, Reply)

Find me a job and I'll name the first superparasite after you ,)

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:08, Reply)

You're coming to Loverpool?
I knew you would stop fighting it soon enough.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:09, Reply)

NEVAH

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:11, Reply)

Well, quite frankly wouldn't that be their own fault for sitting on a bin?

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:24, Reply)

oh ew
I'm about to eat lunch. A pox on your house Beckybix!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:09, Reply)

I got pics if you want 'em ,)

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 13:11, Reply)

yup
and she has the malaria VIRUS, which is tons worse than the protozoal form of the disease which us mere plebs would be exposed to.
( ascorbate, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:18, Reply)

http://www.guardian.co.uk/culture/2010/jul/06/cheryl-cole-malaria-reports
Originally described as the virus, now amended
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:24, Reply)

bastards
spoiling our fun like that! a whole office of parasitologists here, all mocking her, and the paper edits itself. grr.
( ascorbate, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:40, Reply)

She got a bite, bite, bite, bite, bite from this bug

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 12:29, Reply)