Ipod, latest Empire mag
and a knife, just in case I see Bert in a crowd
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:55, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

oh no, not another Kaol
Knife obsession is pretty serious business, and I hope that you're sensible with what is actually an implement of death.

Now atticus, what say we bury the hatchet? I haven't even said 'shut up chompy' to you once yet today
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 14:58, Reply)

Not interested really Bert
You see I am pretty sure I have a good enough read on you now to know that any kind of reconciliation will be temporary until you aren't getting enough attention and go all special needs on us. I won't ignore but I have zero interest in being civil too you. Even writing this response is going to make you sit there squirming in your pants just wanting to write Shut Up Chompy. You see what you fail to understand is that the majority of people on here don't need to make up retarded troll personalities and just enjoy a bit of a laugh. Unfortunately you just push all my buttons and I don't like you. Just move on.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:03, Reply)

shut up, chompy

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:04, Reply)

you stop pushing his buttons, sir!
haha toooooo funny
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:08, Reply)

you have no idea how much I was pissing myself with laughter as I typed it
thank you, chompy, you brighten my day
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:12, Reply)

You're welcome

(PsychoChomp, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:43, Reply)

not you, you fat, rapey shit

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:48, Reply)

Can't we ALL get along on here?
Althogether now

"E-e-e-e-eboneeee and I-i-i-vor-eeee"
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:14, Reply)

nope, you said something about duelling with me with a wet fish in another thread
this puts you in the same league as Becky, al and Gonz in my books, so we're now sworn enemies, and I will do my utmost to attend the next bash and seduce/facerape your woman
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:17, Reply)

So we're on for the duel then?
*selects halibut*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:19, Reply)

hell yeah, bitch
I've got a motherflipping 9lb salmon with your name on it, you lycra shorts wearing homo
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:20, Reply)

Halibut beats a salmon any day of the week.
Plus, I'm a baggy shorts man.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:20, Reply)

don't lie to me
I've seen the pictures
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:23, Reply)

What, of the halibut?

(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:23, Reply)

of your cock bulge in tight shorts
I think it was me who posted them
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:28, Reply)

You just made it obvious now n00b you are. Not so long ago pretty much all of us had retarded troll accounts and this place was pretty different to what it is now.

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:35, Reply)

pretty different to what it is now
so my basis of reference is different to yours. Bert made it personal by making a point of being a twat to me and I can't be bothered to keep biting. Plus the more I get involved in it the more I get dragged into other stuff. I can't win so I won't play.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:42, Reply)

I'm a twat to everyone, you daft shit
and I long for the days of unadulterated trolling on b3ta, all this normal conversation bollocks bores me to tears
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:43, Reply)

Shut Up Bert

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:46, Reply)

I want to hold you down
and fuck you hard
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:49, Reply)

That's because you're not normal.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:46, Reply)

exactly
I come here to get away from the mundane, idle, everyday chat of my colleagues, I want cunts and cocks and serious business, not 'my cat this, my problems that, my daughter got a pea stuck up her nose'.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)

When was it when you first realised that you find it hard to comunicate with the general public in a day-to-day basis?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:55, Reply)

I could ask you the same question
45, 19, 7
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:56, Reply)

C'mon Bert, you're better than a pathetic "No YOU are" response.
I find I get on well with the general public, hence the fact that people like me.

How quickly on average is it when you fuck someone, for their regret to set in, is it just when they get to know you? Chin up big fella, I'm sure it's _them_ each and every time.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 16:03, Reply)

3, 17, 38
I guess it takes a couple of years, Becky was advanced as she didn't actually know me and we hardly spoke in the run-up to our run-in.

But I'd say all in all, my relationships tend to last 2-3 years before they get bored and regret ever going anywhere near me. Thanks for listening, Gonz.

x
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 16:12, Reply)

Kettle, black pot etc...but you don't have to reply to him.

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:47, Reply)

and I think that compared to things I've said to you and Monty
him complaining about my attacks being 'personal' is somewhat of a besmirch upon you all
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:49, Reply)

and I won't from now on but why do you care?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)

because she loves me
and is well aware that we were meant to be together
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)

I don't. I'm just bored of you whinging

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 6 Aug 2010, 16:41, Reply)