stroke of luck
so friday night i'm on the last train home at some ungodly hour. start chatting to some american lads, tourists, on a stop through getting off at hayes and harlington to fly to amsterdam, and then home after a couple of days. give em some tips on where to go and where to avoid, they get off, fine. i go to get off at reading, and find 160 euros on the seat behind me. now in a normal circumstance, i'd hand it in, escpecially if there was any ID or anythign, having lost bucks myself. now these guys were DRUNK, i don't knopw their names, they've left the country, and the chances of them thinking of phoning the train company from amsterdam is infinitely small, it's not worth them coming back to get it as the flights would be more, and i sincerely doubt the likelihood of the lost property office being willing to post a sum of cash to a random american address with no proof of ID etc. what would you have done? i kept it.
alt q: i've got a week off coming up culminating in a bank holiday weekend. should i grow a silly beard? sorry, a silliER beard?
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:59, 21 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Sod it
I once handed a wallet into a police station and they looked at me like I was mad. Never heard back about it.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:07, Reply)

a wallet i'd hand in
cos getting id and stuff replaced sucks, and sometimes people keep sentimental shit in their wallets.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:08, Reply)

I found a wallet once
and I looked at the drivers license and realised the guy lived round the corner from me so I dropped it round and he gave me some cake. It was awesome
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:10, Reply)

ake ock
(Bazongaloid, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:14, Reply)

My wallet got nicked on a night bus once.
I was woken up the following morning by a phone call from my dad - a lovely, lovely woman who lived in Camden had found it (empty of cash but cards etc intact) under a car and tracked down my folks from the address on my driving licence. I had just enough cash lying around for bus fare down to her place and a bunch of flowers to say thanks.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:19, Reply)

If you feel a bit guilty about keeping the money
you could give it to charity. Half to Pakistan and half to China.

Or you could do what I would do and spend it on snorting coke out of a hookers ass beer
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:11, Reply)

option two.
drugs out of my girlfriends ass will do. then more drugs can be purchased and less trips to the clap clinic.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:30, Reply)

I handed in a phone I found in a pub in Oxford last Sunday.
Four hours later I lost my wallet.

Karma-shmarma, I say.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:17, Reply)

Were you on MASSIVE DRUGS
when you lost your wallet?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:17, Reply)

Nope
I was on my way home from lunch with my father. I'd drunk two Peronis and a cognac, effectively nothing at all...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:21, Reply)

your dad stole your wallet
case closed
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:22, Reply)

I blame the Muslim community.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:22, Reply)

"Effectively nothing at all"
Precisely, I dont even consider myself as having had a drink until at least the fourth pint.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:38, Reply)

Yup me too,
Any amount lower than that merely classes as an aperitif.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:50, Reply)

The cosmos hates you
I suggest you fight back with FUNK!
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:20, Reply)

the last thing i found was a memory stick
with some dude's programming coursework, luckily it had a headed pdf from the small IT college he was studying at. i sent an email to the college informing them i'd found a memory stikc and the name of the student on the document on it. i got a snotty email saying to return it at once to the campus, no thanks nothing. i wasn't really up for a four mile walk in the cold to return something for no thanks, so i replied suggesting as the student clearly had been in the vicinity of my house, he could collect it at his leisure, gave an email address and phone number. got another email saying 'please return this stick to the address as requested.

sent another email saying 'don't take the piss'
end of communication.
lazy fuck. still have it, kept it for 6 months, then my usb key died, and i thought, fine, time's up.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:28, Reply)

I thought it was 160 euros?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:29, Reply)

euros- plural. hence the last 'THING' (singular)
was the memory stick.
aicmfp.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:31, Reply)

that is a poor excuse
but I'll accept it and move on.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:32, Reply)

pedantry
the cornerstone of any tenuous argument.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:33, Reply)

*high fives*
That's my SHIT, yo.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 11:37, Reply)