if my mood gets much worse today...
up at 5.45am and left house at 6.30am because bob crow thinks it's 1970. not only am i now in work ridiculously early, i had to walk for miles in the rain in my suit (it was that or carry it) and i now look like shit. oh and i have a meeting this morning on "how to be a partner".

on top of that there is a burglar alarm going off right outside my office window.

i feel like a grizzly bear with pmt. raaah.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:36, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Shit
Should I play dead or run at you waving my arms and screaming?
I can never remmber.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:38, Reply)

if you ran at me screaming
it would make me laugh. and in my current mood that might actually crack my face. so best go with playing dead!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:40, Reply)

You wouldn't laugh at a dead person just lying there?
Weirdo.
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:41, Reply)

depends who it was mein lieb
depends who it was. if it were roota, no of course i wouldn't laugh. i'd weep buckets. then step gingerly around the corpse and blame it on an OT patsy.

(where IS bob this morning?!?)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:47, Reply)

Nein! Deutsch! Meine alleinige Schwäche!
Wait, what if it were me?

HEY OT MY MUM HATES ME I'MA KILL MYSELF TO DEAD YOU'LL BE SORRY
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:51, Reply)

did you
just call me your mum???

i shall be bringing out monty's cheesewire of doom!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:54, Reply)

i shall be bringing out monty's cheesewire of doom

This is making me moist and I am off to buy a ciabatta
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:56, Reply)

brilliant
the breadfrotting AND the slkfrotting are really taking off.

yay!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:59, Reply)

Nono. See above re: toothbrushes.
...or, wait, do you *want* me to? I can if you wish...

Edit: slkfrotting? What's an slk?
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 9:02, Reply)

omg
the bestest car in the world!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 9:12, Reply)

Yeah, I can hear the frotting there.

(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 9:23, Reply)

The best defence is to pick up your canoe.
I heard this on radio 4, so it must be true.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:41, Reply)

...just in case the bear steps on it, which would be an inconvenience to your journey home were you to survive the initial bear-related encounter?

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 10:03, Reply)

It's lovely in Devon this morning and I am delighted to be out of London today. Bob Crow is a cunt.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:48, Reply)

of the very worst sort
i hate him. i am so tempted to send him a bill for all my taxis and time spent out of the office and evenings missed, for which there is no price but for which i will accept damages. then he can magnify me by the 8,000,000 other londoners whose day he is ruining. god i hate him!!!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:51, Reply)

Where abouts are you?
I've just come back from my hols down in the far side of Tavistock.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:52, Reply)

Just outside Axminster - Little Trill near Musbury.
Went to a great pub in Branscombe last night - The Masons Arms - do you know it?
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:53, Reply)

No, but I'll look it up.
Devon for me means Dartmoor and Exemoor.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 8:55, Reply)

I know the Masons
I prefer the Fountainhead though. May have changed since I was last there admittedly.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 10:01, Reply)

To echo my Mongbook status this morning
"I hope that Bob Crow returns home from a hard day inconveniencing commuters to find someone in bed with his wife".
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 4 Oct 2010, 9:04, Reply)

I'm on it!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 4 Oct 2010, 9:17, Reply)