Go to work you lazy creature.
Then let the boss send you home.

I'm not very content with my life, even though I should be.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 7:39, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

^this
Given the recent nature of your employment, best to get in early with a graphic demonstration that when you claim to be ill you really are. First impressions last.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 7:45, Reply)

Also, everybody in my office has the sniffles at the least, and not a single sicky is taken.
Couple of Parrots eat'em all, and you'll be fine.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 7:47, Reply)

Coolio, I'm just gonna leave after this fag.
Today they're taking me out to the data centre, which I don't really get 'cus there are 4 of us going, everyone is excited to go, and I need photo ID.

I ain't been to a data centre, but the fact that everyone is woo-hoo'ing over it makes me suspect that this data centre might be a bit more than just that.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:05, Reply)

If you like looking at racks of computers and switches, you will love it.
Otherwise, boring.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:07, Reply)

There's probably a pub for lunch involved
and no rush to get back to the office...
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:27, Reply)

It's like the Playboy Mansion, I heard.
There are, like, HOT CHICKS all over the place in lab coats and glasses, which they keep looking seductively over and pouting.

That's what I heard, anyway. Chompy told me.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Oct 2010, 8:29, Reply)