FOOD BASTARDS OF THE WEEKEND
I need answers.

I know very little about food. Off the cuff I bought a chicken to roast this afternoon. I realised today that I have no stuffing.

What is the point of stuffing? Do I need it? If I do need it, what is the cheapest stuffing to create?

Thanks in advance, now fuck off and enjoy what's left of your pitiful weekend.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:25, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

hi bert
paxo
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:26, Reply)

Do not accuse me of being Bert
I am TDW, The Dirty Weeker, Finn McCool and whenanimalsattackhumans

all rolled into one. Please give me some answers, I need to cook chicken!
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:28, Reply)

meh
it's an auto-complete whenever anyone is rude. oh wait.

hello tdw. that's better. i'm vegetarian, i'm useless. er. stick in the oven, then stick the potatoes in after a bit, then the veg on the hob i think. paxo and gravy in the microwave or something?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:28, Reply)

I will try that .... unless someone else can help further
(Sorry was trying to be all Charlie Brooker hilarious)
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:32, Reply)

unfortunately
bert has overruled it. but you just said sorry. so your "dirtyweeker not bert" story checks out.

i think.

i've been wrong before.

*narrowed eyes*
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:33, Reply)

*acts like a cunt*
*flounces*
*returns*
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:55, Reply)

hahahaha
i believe you.

99%.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:59, Reply)

There is no point in stuffing.
Just roast the bastard. Or cut a lemon and whole bulb of garlic in half and stick it all up its backside. If you do stuff it, only fill the bottom half of the cavity, don't stuff it full of stuffing else it'll take forever to cook properly.
Edit: if in doubt, ask Delia: www.deliaonline.com/how-to-cook/chicken-and-other-poultry/how-to-roast-chicken.html
I don't put stuffing inside the bird anyway, it goes too squishy. Make balls out of it and stick them on a baking tray until they go cripsy at the edges.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:38, Reply)

i seem to have arrived home
with monster munch and houmous last night. must have stopped at 24 hour shop.

I BLAME YOU.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:40, Reply)

I accept the blame gracefully.
Did you wake up honking of garlic with your teeth stuck together?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:42, Reply)

oh no i didn't eat them
that would have been far too logical.

no, i just went to bed and left them on the counter as a present to myself in the morning. fortunately i did have the foresight to put the houmous in the fridge, so all good.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:43, Reply)

Drunken Rachel is foresightful Rachel.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:46, Reply)

if only this were always true

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:49, Reply)

Thanks to you Noel
not sure about that bacon trick though...
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:56, Reply)

Bacon on top of chicken is the best way
It gets brilliantly crispy.
Just a quick warning: if you do the bacon trick, the surface meat will look pink, it will be cooked, this is just due to the bacon. It's the stuff in the thighs you have to check
( Tedium Alduce me to interlow myself., Sun 17 Oct 2010, 11:59, Reply)