he's still tied to my bedstead
it's iron so it should hold him a while.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 10:50, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

He'll enjoy that.
It must be more fun than being forced to lick-clean the carpet in the spare room!

A story that still shocks me.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 10:51, Reply)

ugh I hate people rubbing their hands over carpet
licking it makes me feel sick
*vomits on carpet*
*monty licks it off*
*vomits again*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 10:54, Reply)

You'd love that.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:13, Reply)

and me
i am tempted to put something about it on facebook, worst of all the burns, but then the mutual friend would just get into trouble.

foul incontinent bitch!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:05, Reply)

What is more amazing
Is that you said you fell out over something completely different.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:07, Reply)

well yeah
i only found out about this episode more than a year after she moved out!

we fell out because she felt i didn't pay enough attention to her wonderful new boyfriend even though (i) she brought him to my birthday party to introduce him without asking; (ii) they sat and snogged all night (they were 38 and 40) so noone wanted to go near them; (iii) then they had a big row; (iv) he happily let everyone buy him drinks all night despite not knowing anyone, and never put his hand in his pocket once, and in this bar the beers were a tenner each; and (v) they split up a month later. this was the final straw after a lot of selfish behaviour on her part, so i just stopped calling/texting/emailing her as a result!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:24, Reply)

What sort of idiot chooses to go to a bar where the beers are a tenner each?
Was it a clip joint?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:28, Reply)

fairly typical for a fancy bottled beer
in some bars round here, sadly.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:34, Reply)

I still use some pubs that'll sell me a nice cider for £1.45 a pint!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:36, Reply)