Are Greggs open this time of night?
Sorry, I can't help myself. I'm like that woman who put that cat in a bin
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:15, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

there is a certain physical resemblance, yes

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:21, Reply)

I bring it on myself.
I'm sorry.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:23, Reply)

sorry?
show me the male specimen that knows the meaning of the word
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:24, Reply)

Well there is me.
I'm the most remorseful person I know.

(But I'm also the biggest twat I know as well, it it kinds evens out).
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:26, Reply)

yes but how do i know you are a man?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:27, Reply)

Would a woman call herself JeffTheDogFucker?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:28, Reply)

or rogerthestarfish?
with no pictoral evidence, my jury is out.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:32, Reply)

Ooooh. Harsh.
*Ponders how to prove himself as being all man without posting pictures of himself online*
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:34, Reply)

cockshot?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:35, Reply)

Sounds painful.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:37, Reply)

meh
good solution for a lot of your type!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:38, Reply)

If they were, I'd not be sat here
I'd be indulging in pastry based goodness
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:21, Reply)

my ex
once refused to go out for lunch with me because he wanted a pasty from greggs. we had a massive row and i stormed off. eventually he caught up with me and presented me with a cheese and onion pasty of my own as a peaceoffering. i was Unimpressed but a million times more so later on when i drove past it and realised they were "buy one get one free"...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:26, Reply)

hahahaha

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:26, Reply)

yes
now you see why i am so anti-men!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:28, Reply)

But yet pro-Greggs.
Your life must be one of constant angst.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:29, Reply)

i am not pro-greggs
i have about 3 sets of court proceedings against greggs on my to-do list!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:32, Reply)

Oh yeah, You mentioned that a while ago.
At least, regardless of how the court proceedings go, you have the knowledge that you once took a free pasty from them.

So you'll be a winner in my eyes.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:35, Reply)

nothing exciting
i do hope their pasties choke my ex one day though for that!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:36, Reply)

Hahaha
Pastry Fail! What a fucking tightwad - My wife'd pan me if I got her a pasty after a blue.

I must admit, the only time we ever go there is when we're up in the lake district and go there early doors to get a pack up for the day ... This said I'm a son of a bitch for their individual pizzas.

We have a Cooplands the next village over from work so may swing in tomorrow.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:31, Reply)

tight does not cover the half of it!
cheese and onion ftw. go for it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:33, Reply)

If I were even remotely into masochism
I'd get her one - Although, Sheffield A&E would be removing the first rectally inserted pasty.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:38, Reply)

this is why you are married
and he is my ex.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:38, Reply)

Good point
Is this the infamous bed shitter?
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:42, Reply)

this one was, yeah
i do, however, have many many lame stories!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:49, Reply)

Maybe
A rectally inserted pasty could have saved the linen :D
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:54, Reply)

yes but
that would have meant carrying out the insertion in the first place.

to quote toy story... "my arms are too short"
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 19:58, Reply)

It's a new range for Gregg's
Pre-lubed pastys for self insertion.

Prevents 99% of all bed shitting incidents (Greggs does not accept liability for the 1% of incidents which result in infamy on teh internets)
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sun 24 Oct 2010, 20:27, Reply)