Am I too private?
Maybe I should 'take a chill pill' but it annoys me when someone at work asks me what I'm listening to on my ipod. Why? Also, if they see me slip a book into my bag as I nip out for lunch, it's: "What are you reading?" - "It's a fucking book, OK?" what difference if it's J-P Sartre or J.K. Rowling?? Why do you want to know? Are you compiling a dossier on me? Go away.

Oh yes, neighbours. God forbid I should wash my car outside my house - if I had a pound for every time some twat said "You can do mine after"...I'd have enough for a jet wash. Or when I'm cutting the 100ft bastard 7ft high privet hedge..."Got a job there!" they kindly remind me as my shins are barked by the step ladder steps and the sweat patches on my back and chest get bigger.

Oh, and why is it that EVERY SINGLE TIME I put my ipod on, I have the 'L' phone in my right hand and the 'R' one in my left and have to swap them over. EVERY SINGLE TIME.

Yeah, and ladies: if you don't want blokes gawping at your cleavage - PUT THEM AWAY, don't go glaring at me like I'm some sick pervert for glancing at your wobblies if they are out on display, what do you want?

And the rest of you: just stop it will you? It really annoys me, so don't do it. It's like the dwarf with an IQ of 65 - it's not big and it's not clever.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 6 May 2008, 13:39, 14 replies)

I often ask what someone is reading if they're carrying a book
That's because I'm both nosey and an intellectual snob.

And I'm always on the lookout for a good read.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 6 May 2008, 13:41, closed)

@Ancrenne
In what way? It is virtually impossible not to glance at a cleavage when it walks past you in the street - I'm talking about those women that wear unnecessarily (sp?) low tops - usually with the bra strap showing and usually accompanied by a matching view of thong at the back end of over-tight, ill-fitting jeans (shudder). Anyway, I can't actually remember having one of these specimans ever 'giving me evils' in actuality, but in theory...I can imagine them saying "What are you gawping at?"

Maybe it's just the fine weather today...sorry. I am a nice person, honest!
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 6 May 2008, 14:12, closed)

The old Viz top tip
avoid neighbours saying "you can do mine next" by keeping a hammer nearby and smashing your car with it as they approach.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Tue 6 May 2008, 14:15, closed)

@ancrenne
I do understand this, but it's when women have gone out with a top so low that their nipples are barely covered, and then complain that they are being viewed as sexual objects. Not just having your straps out.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Tue 6 May 2008, 14:35, closed)

Exacly Madam M.
And also, I always try to avoid gawping. Maybe it's hypocritcal to look/glance, when a gawp would be more honest, but honestly, it is genuinely a glance because it is difficult not to, nay, rude, to pretend you haven't noticed.

And furthermore - why display cleavage? Is it to make you more attractive? If so, it works, if it is for some other reason, pray tell.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 6 May 2008, 14:42, closed)

.
Simply tell your neighbor that you've paid yourself $100 to wash your car, and you'll happily wash his car, provided he pays you the same fee. (Feel free to substitute a currency other than dollars if you please)

As for the cleavage issue...I have a similar gripe. Women who wear shirts with words printed on them, and then get offended when I innocently read what is written. I'm not trying to stare at your chest - I'm married and thus may as well have been castrated - but if there are words somewhere, I can't help but read them. This applies to billboards, warning labels, and yes, shirts. At a party recently my wife introduced me to her friend, telling me how sweet this woman is, what a good friend she is, etc. She was wearing a t-shirt with some type of crest on it, with script writing beneath the crest. I squinted to read it...and my wife's friend gave me a disapproving look, which I think was entirely undeserved.
(chase, Tue 6 May 2008, 14:50, closed)

mmm
i do love looking at girls jubblies when they are out in the sun, bouncy bouncy bouncy. Ooh ooh ooh, and it is almost hot pants weather too! Camel toe-tastic!

mmmmm, firm breasts with large erect nipples straining at the ever so slightly undersized 100% cotton top.
(little lord muthafuckin fauntleroy, Tue 6 May 2008, 15:02, closed)

You should be able to dress exactly as you want
And if you want to show your cleavage, then that's fine. It is, however, the female eqivelent of going around with your bollocks hanging out ( a sight I am subjected to by my flatmate), and should be viewed accordingly. There is also a big difference between just having a large chest that cleavages whatever you do, and specifically hoisting the whole lot on the world. Which again, is fine, but you can't get upset if blokes stare at your tits. It's not about judgement, it's just hard not to look and then feel pervy when it's not really your fault.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Tue 6 May 2008, 15:52, closed)

Sorry ancrenne
I didn't mean it that way. I meant that if a guy had his balls hanging out, then women would stare. It's just the same sort of thing. We as a race seem to have an uncontrolable need to look at other peoples bits.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Tue 6 May 2008, 17:10, closed)