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This is a question Pretentious bollocks

Possibly the worst event I ever went to was an evening of turntablists in London. The lights went down, the first guy put a cymbal onto a turntable, dropped the needle on it and left it making screeching noises for ten minutes.

When the lights came up, half the audience had snuck out.

What's the most pretentious rubbish you've ever been to see in the name of art?

(, Wed 28 Sep 2005, 14:19)
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Apocalypse now
A shrieking "look at me" actress friend of a friend was involved in a play at a small theatre in Hoxton (of course), that explored the notion of "life following the apocalypse".

It began predictably enough with the sound of howling wind, and a girl in a white dress centre stage slowly moving her arms and sobbing.

All kinds of things happened, but the high spot was when one man with a giant fork attached to his head fought a man with a giant spoon on his. They were broken up by an angry chainsaw-wielding bearded man wearing a black strap-on prosthetic cock.

Our friend's role was "girl in sandpit". She had to sit in a sandpit in a nightie shouting "WHY? WHY?" every so often. It was quite good because you could see her nipples.

Afterwards she bounded over and asked what we thought; we shuffled nervously and said it was very interesting - how was she finding it? She replied "It's so rewarding but God it's draining - I have two performances per week".

If this is the apocalypse then roll on doomsday.
(, Wed 28 Sep 2005, 15:26, Reply)

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