Professional Northerners.
Because they are fucking cunts.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:24, 32 replies)

No Monty.
...they are fookin cunts.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:27, closed)

Shut up you soft southern bastard.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 28 May 2010, 14:01, closed)

bloody
shandy drinkers. Never 'eard of Boddingtons*, supping their Drambuie like reet poofs. Can't even get proper feckin' gravy fer us chips "dahn sarf"
Rant over.

*Boddingtons is shit anyway.
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Fri 28 May 2010, 14:14, closed)

Boddingtons.
Not a patch on a lager top.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 28 May 2010, 14:55, closed)

Did you say 'facking cants'?
What are they?
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:37, closed)

No I did not.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:57, closed)

Hahahahaha

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:29, closed)

I gave my mother
a lesson in how to pronounce this phrase correctly after she had been complaining about the builders....any suggestions for the next swearing lesson?
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:38, closed)

"Rimming"

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:58, closed)

No.
She knows all about that.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:14, closed)

True.
She's very good at it.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:28, closed)

ponytailed snatchpipes

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 28 May 2010, 19:35, closed)

IE the entire audience for Peter Kay.
"Oh I get that because I can reeeelly relate to it 'cos we're all Northern working class in my family."

It's like bloody students laughing at drug jokes.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 28 May 2010, 10:47, closed)

Or Cockneys laughing at racist jokes.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:14, closed)

This too.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:29, closed)

Yeah!
I hate it when comedians appeal to their demographic. Nothing gets my blood boiling more than black people laughing at Dave Chappelle, or liberal-leaning graduates guffawing at Stephen Fry. The big fakes.
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:32, closed)

I hate black gay liberals...
...laughing at Chubby Brown.
Post modernist cunts.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:37, closed)

I hate people laughing because they're trying to prove a point , as opposed to laughing because they find it funny.
Which is the entire Peter Kay audience, and students laughing at drug jokes.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 28 May 2010, 13:13, closed)

I hate people laughing.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 13:49, closed)

I hate
-
(unclestinky, Fri 28 May 2010, 19:35, closed)

@ Wet chinned bag-shanker
Spot on! (and vagabond must think he's some kind of fucking psychic. He's also a twat.)
(discopants, Fri 28 May 2010, 13:16, closed)

Your mum's a twat.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 28 May 2010, 13:39, closed)

I used to like Peter Kay...
...'cos of Phoenix Nights

Then I found out most of the good bits were written by Dave Spikey, and the rest of the good bits were written by Neil Fitzmaurice, and the fat Bolton tossbag had taken the credit for all of it and pissed off Spikey and Fitzmaurice so much they'd gone off the idea of ever working with him again.

Amazingly enough, the Max and Paddy thing Kay did as a spin-off was as funny as those pictures of Alex Higgins looking like Dobby the House Elf in the papers last weekend. Ok, bad metaphor - as funny as something very unfunny. Imagine my surprise
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Fri 28 May 2010, 17:05, closed)

what is a
professional northerner? Please do elaborate, old chap...
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Fri 28 May 2010, 11:37, closed)

I am a
northerner, also a working professional. Erm. How and why does this invite your rage and scathing on such a level?
(berk, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:07, closed)

I Think...
That "Professional Northerner" can only really be applied to the Gallagher brothers [who are genetic throwbacks anyhow], and Peter Kay, who beyond jokes about Eccles Cakes, isn't funny at all.

However, if the OP is referring to professionals who happen to be from the North, like myself, then I'll gladly point out the exit they should use.
(caescarna Hell's Roomba, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:44, closed)

It's just fear really.
Even as far south as Sussex I'm sometimes gripped by an irrational dread that a northerner is going to come thundering into my garden and start digging up the flowerbeds saying 'Where there's muck there's brass!'
And then there's the mournful brass bands and Allinson's wholemeal and the self-pitying towns killed off by Maggie. It's all just too depressing and ghastly.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Fri 28 May 2010, 12:44, closed)

^ Haha, quite so.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 28 May 2010, 13:50, closed)

Lol Southerners
Go back to being soft as shite, unimaginative and egotistical. There's a good reason most of the worlds nukes are aimed at London y'know.

Pricks.
(mr-lizard Hell's teeth man!, Fri 28 May 2010, 14:06, closed)

don't rise to it
its what THEY want....
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Fri 28 May 2010, 14:11, closed)

There is:
it's globally important. Only British people want to nuke Wigan.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 31 May 2010, 19:37, closed)

If I flatter myself
I'd say I am a Pro/Am northerner, It's a big step moving up from the hobbyist level.
('tin'tintin, Fri 28 May 2010, 15:21, closed)