Who framed Roger Rabbit?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 12 Jul 2013, 15:08, Reply)

My cousin once set fire to his pubes in my flat and it took about a week to get rid of the smell
What did your cousin once set fire to in your flat and it took about a week to get rid of the smell?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 12 Jul 2013, 15:07, Reply)

I once pooed out a fully intact piece of kebab meat
What fully intact types of meat have you pooed out?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 12 Jul 2013, 15:06, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

What does it mean if your helmet smells of apples?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 12 Jul 2013, 14:55, Reply)

Heaven
Should cats be allowed in heaven?

Because dogs are already there.
( The Scrunt Wants a Dozen Pints, Fri 12 Jul 2013, 8:10, Reply)

Wasted Effort
Have you ever worked really hard to come up with loads and loads of questions for something, only to have every single one ignored? What did you do about? Killing spree? Shopping spree? Fuck all?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:37, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

Trivial Errors, Terrible Effects
With the Russian Proton rocket crash being blamed on sensors being mounted upside down, despite big red "This Way Up" arrows being painted on them. What's the simplest error you made that led to the worst consequences?
( Amish Information Systems hates misplaced, commas, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:24, Reply)

Unreasonable cruelty.
An incident at a recent event: Someone had walked up to a guy with a lobe extension, and asked if they could padlock their ear to a fence and take a picture. He, thinking it would make a cool picture agreed. He was promptly padlocked to the fence, at which point the other guy simply fucked off.

What's the harshest thing you've done, or witnessed someone do to their fellow man?
( Muns, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 13:37, Reply)

Andy Warhol once said that we all get 15 minutes of fame.
Make a question out of that. It's your fucking website!
( Muns, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 13:12, Reply)

Cats are cunts
Self explanatory really
(Claude Speed was a Roman called Claudius Speedicus, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 1:05, Reply)

What's the baldmonkey story?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 10 Jul 2013, 17:02, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

How many roads must a man walk down
Before they can call him a man?
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 10 Jul 2013, 9:09, Reply)

body horror
i once picked a spot on my cheek only for a half-inch long ingrown hair to coil out covered in pus.

how has your own body made you recoil in disgust?
( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 22:39, Reply)

The best days of your life?
Summer of '69 etc.

When was the best time you have ever had? Young free single in Ibiza, trekking with mates in Peru, winning the school prize for top swat?

I spent a couple of really happy summers in the 1990s going to the beach most weekends, and sailing. If I could choose a time of my life to repeat, that would be it.

What would you choose? - could be a day, week, year, even a decade.
(username failed moderation, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 17:43, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

'Av yew everr sin blud in the moonloight?
'Er appears quoite, quoite blaaack.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 12:10, Reply)

I was going to ask a question, but I forgot what it was
What were you going to do but you forgot what it was?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 8 Jul 2013, 16:27, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

Who wants cream?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 19:38, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

when i were a wee lad...
boring stories about how things have changed since you were young, because everyone seems to be well old on this forum
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 12:45, Reply)

Catharsis
In psychiatry this represents the discharge of pent-up emotions so as to result in the alleviation of symptoms or the permanent relief of the condition.

I.E: My current manager is a fuckwit of the highest order, which in turn is making my job a pain in the arse. She must give an excellent blowjob to be able keep her position and seems to be completely untouchable as a result. A few of us make sure that we only fart within a few feet of her.

It cheers us up no end.

How do you get yours?
( Muns, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 11:21, Reply)

There should be a special place in hell
reserved for people who call it (McDonald's) "Mickey D's"

(from my reply to this post)

For whom would you reserve a special place in hell*, and why? What eternal suffering would you have inflicted upon them?

*The non-existence of hell does not preclude you from answering this question. You could just suggest how you might torture them in your basement**.

**Nor does the non-existence of your basement preclude you from answering this question.
( wakeupandsmellthebacon, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 10:43, 3 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

And where?
And where?
IS THE BATMAN?
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 16:54, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

What's your mobile phone number please?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 15:49, 5 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 3 Jul 2013, 15:49, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

The Morning After The Night Before
Tell us about your best/worst morning afters. Be it after a night of indulgence, meeting the girl/boy of your dreams or your first morning with a ball and chain round your ankle. Or maybe it was the morning carrying on from the night before with no gaps. Or maybe you were just taking a shit in a graveyard.
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Tue 2 Jul 2013, 16:34, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

voodoo

( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Tue 2 Jul 2013, 9:14, 4 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Plasticine.
My mummy let's me use plasticine. Sarah is only allowed to use play dough because she is only three. I made Mummy and Daddy. Daddy has blue hair because there isn't any white plasticine left because it got all muddy when Sarah played with it and she put some in her noise.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 2 Jul 2013, 9:04, Reply)

Times Tables.
I can do all the way up to sixes but I have to add them up after seven sixes are forty two. Teacher says I'm very special and kind.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 2 Jul 2013, 9:02, Reply)

What's the name of that song that goes "Da da-da da, da d-da d-da d-da d-ah....duh dun....DAH dun"
I think it's by Deep Purple
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 1 Jul 2013, 20:11, 5 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Is it still xenophobia if you insult a foreign dog?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 1 Jul 2013, 16:19, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

What knots can you do?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 1 Jul 2013, 16:18, Reply)