I know there's already been a few...
But Blackpool is pretty much the only place in the world I'll never again visit. My mate decided for his birthday that we'd all go to Blackpool for the night, book a hotel and go home the next day. I hadn't been there since I was a nipper so my memories of the place were a bit hazy, so I agreed thinking it'd be a good night. We got there in one piece and checked in. Our hotel was cheap but had possibly the best/worst feature I've ever seen, the genius wardrobe/shower! Yeah, a shower, in the wardrobe.

Anyways, we've got a few uni mates from Blackpool so we met up with those lads and the whole night went pretty well. It was after we got kicked out of the last club and it was our lot and this other gang. Now, when me and one particular mate like to sing football songs when we're pissed. Dunno why, we just do. We're Everton fans so we find it a bit funny to subject other drunk people to songs about teams outside the 'big 4'.

Turns out that these lads were Man Utd fans. There's not too much of a rivalry between our clubs, apart from North West proximity, so we thought of our biggest bragging rights over the Mancs. The 1-0 victory in the 1995 FA Cup final! It was 2004. We started singing a song about Paul Rideout, scorer of the winning goal. They proper kicked off. Even though, in the 9 YEARS since the final, we hadn't beaten them since. They'd won the Champion's League and every domestic cup (except maybe the League Cup). Surely they could see the funny side of a couple of supporters of an avaerage team celebrating a 9 year old victory?

No. This group of about 15 lads started beating the shit out of me and my 5 mates. Everyone else walked away with cuts and bruises. Not me. I staggered away with blood gushing from my mouth and the inability to support my own weight. About 50 yards down the road (another of my mates pretty much carried me there), I collapsed. I woke up for a moment in the back of an ambulance and then periodically in a hospital waiting room, sometimes seeing a mate asking a nurse why they haven't seen to me yet and pointing our that blood pouring from the mouth whilst being unconcious "is not right". I woke up at around 7, still hadn't been seen to, and decided to go back to the hotel. The nurse tried to stop me, but when she couldn't meet my demands of seeing a doctor in the next 5 minutes, I told her I was off.

After a long drive back home (I was the only one with a licence, gay), I went to hospital again as I couldn't open my mouth. I was seen within half an hour, x-rayed and told I had a broken jaw in 2 places. A metal plate for life and my jaw wired shut for about 6 weeks. Thanks Blackpool.


Edit: just put some breaks in, didn't realise I'd typed so much
(Visionaryofthe1980s www.myspace.com/visionariesofthe1980s, Sat 31 Oct 2009, 4:36, 11 replies)

If all scousers had their jaws wired
permanently, then things like this wouldn't happen.

Football songs - terraces = knobber
( Piper Alpha is being a grumpy northerm bastard on:, Sat 31 Oct 2009, 8:41, closed)

Idiot
Lads singing footie songs, inside, outside or anywhere that's not a football ground deserve a slap regardless of what team they support.

The kicking was severe I admit, but a slap would have been perfectly acceptable..

You can't blame Blackpool for that, only yourselves.
(danniekavanagh did nothing constructive on, Sat 31 Oct 2009, 9:23, closed)

Aye, Blackpool's a shit hole
To be honest I think you could've been completely silent and the risk of that happening wouldn't of diminished. British coastal town in general are dumps.
( sir_spicious2000 Crap I've watched: www.filmplop.blogspot.com/, Sat 31 Oct 2009, 9:57, closed)

.
I am so used to that pain of being an Everton fan . . .
(ihaveab3tanamenow, Sat 31 Oct 2009, 11:12, closed)

So, in summary...
Pissed up Everton fans wind up Man Utd football fans and get a kicking.
This is totally the fault of the town you were in at the time.

Cock
( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Sat 31 Oct 2009, 19:59, closed)

I'm an Everton fan.
And I agree with this.
(ste_mc_efc, Sat 31 Oct 2009, 20:19, closed)

*nods*
me too!
( Ping_Pang_Piddley_Dee couldn't give a big shiny fuck., Tue 3 Nov 2009, 14:38, closed)

I've always thought violence was a totally acceptable reaction to singing.
After all, beating people until they're bleeding and broken on the ground is a fine thing to do when they're singing about a soccer player. Totally okay reaction.

Maybe it's because I don't live in the UK... See, in NZ, Rugby fans don't beat the everloving shit out of each other over the tiniest thing. Must have to be a local to get it?
(Scritty Bakerman., Wed 4 Nov 2009, 0:03, closed)

It's not an acceptable reaction.
But because of the prevalence of behaviour like that it's a bit naive to sing football songs in town centres of a night, with lots of drunks around. Especially not in a city away from where said team are based.

And it definitely isn't the fault of the town.
(ste_mc_efc, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 16:39, closed)

Football is crap
For this exact reason. Why the hell should people get permanent life-affecting injuries over a silly game of kicking a bag of air around, regardless of how much they were trolling about it. It's insane.

As for Blackpool as a night place, went there once on a stag do and didn't find any trouble thankfully. Syndicate was pretty cool. I don't like it by day though - it's like any seaside town, the basic gist of the place is all about how common workers had their first "holiday" type ventures there several decades ago. The cheap tackiness, the clichés, everything has stood still ever since.

You look at the place and it's all full of peeling paint, fading signs and a "can't be arsed" attitude. Yuck.
(Cloudane, Sun 1 Nov 2009, 1:41, closed)

Blackpool - Where cunts go on holiday
Maybe they were the same Manc fans who started kicking off with me for having the audacity of cheering when Louis Saha netted in the 09 cup final. If it wasn't for a couple of rather large Chelsea fans I may also be sporting a jaw plate.

I wake up every morning giving thanks that I now live in St Annes. Which despite only being 6 miles away, is 6 miles in the right direction
(Peter O'Hanraha-hanrahan, Tue 3 Nov 2009, 2:21, closed)