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This is a question School Assemblies

Our school assemblies were often presided over by the local vicar, who once warned us of the dreadful dangers of mixing with "Rods and Mockers". One of the cool teachers laughed. Tell us about mad headteachers and assemblies gone wrong.

Inspired by the mighty @Rhodri on Twitter

(, Thu 13 Jun 2013, 12:43)
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Once the entire complement of 450 boys was ordered to the sports hall for a special assembly
We were obviously intrigued as to why it was just the boys that had been invited to this assembly, and very amused to learn that the reason was that some filthy rotter had done a big shit on the floor in one of the boys' toilets.

I don't know if they ever caught the perpetrator.
(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 11:50, 14 replies)
How, exactly, did they know it wasn't a girl that had done a huge shit on the floor of the boys' toilet.

(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 14:01, closed)
My thoughts exactly
It would be the perfect crime.
(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 14:57, closed)
Something very similar happened at my school
Only it was done in a urinal. This has always impressed me not least because the toilet doors directly faced the urinals as you entered the toilets. Risky business, he who dares etc
(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 14:19, closed)
I'm 32 years old and I still find this sort of thing hilarious
It's bested only by shitting in the piano, which I've heard one too many times for it to be true.
(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 14:58, closed)
The toilets were next to our classroom, and one day after our class and before the next, one of the lads
Came in with an impressively huge log in a paper hammock, very pleased with himself, and left it on the desk to show the teacher.

Thankfully we had a different class in a different room with a different teacher that we had to get to, and made our way over.
(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 15:40, closed)
Something similar happened at my old place of work.
Except it was a woman shitting on the toiled seat.
(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 14:59, closed)
This post is a repeat.
Although it was funnier when you mentioned a length of dirty spine.
(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 15:57, closed)
He was probably the culprit and just forgot the fact.

(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 16:02, closed)
Oh yes, you're right
That must have been where I heard about the shitty piano before too. What was that qotw?
(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 16:34, closed)

The current one.
(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 16:41, closed)
Hahaha I must have been drunk
Turns out this is actually the third time I've posted it. The first time I referred to it as a "dirty Richard".


Although in fairness that at least was a different qotw.
(, Tue 18 Jun 2013, 16:47, closed)
This is Groundhog done a poo day

(, Wed 19 Jun 2013, 4:11, closed)

When was this?
(, Wed 19 Jun 2013, 7:07, closed)
Mid nineties
Possibly 1994? I went to school in Worcester if it's any help.
(, Wed 19 Jun 2013, 19:00, closed)

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